All comics by OMG_DaGmAr_6481987

Profile

 

In Computer Engineering Tech I...
Hey, does anyone know anything about computers?
No.

 

People are liars....
Wow Dagmar, I love your comics!
Really?
Your comics taste better than my feet!
Err...wow. Thanks!
And then there are those who actually tell the truth.
Your comics suck so bad that I don't even want to cornhole you.
...

 

If I were to tell everyone what I really thought, nobody would like me very much.
All the overused Cowboy Physics, asian whore, and cornholing jokes are really getting to me. I should've never jumped into the forums even after being here for months.
haha!
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT! I KNOW HOW IT GOES! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!
That time of the month, eh, Dagmar?

 

You really should listen to SoaD's songs. Most of them are not on the radio not because they are good, but because they're about things nobody really wants to hear.
Well, I wouldn't...
Except for you and I, of course. They discuss the angst of reality, the philosophical part of life.
Nice. Definately.
One of their songs has a kickass beat to it!
That was random...

 

LZOORUMEKSLKJHUH, we need to get going. We only have 1 ...LZOORUMEKSLKJHUH?!
LOLO HE HANGS HIS COATS ON HANGARS OMG
YAR!
What are you looking at?

 

Okay. So now that we're finally moving, who wants to sing a song?
NO.
NO.
Okay.
Nuu!
Really?

 

Mein Hut, er hat drei Ecken! Drei Ecken hat mein Hut! Und hat er nicht drei Ecken, denn er ist nicht mein Hut! Toot Toot!
GET HIM TO STOP, DAGMAR! GET HIM TO STOP!
But I like this song!
Yeah! She likes this song!
Mein Hut, er hat drei Ecken! Drei Ecken hat mein Hut! Und hat er nicht drei Ecken, denn er ist nicht mein Hut! Toot Toot!
You dendrophile!

 

 

Awesome!
On the weather, 1 flake of snow is going to hit an obscure point on the tip of a mountain.
Hey, it's gonna snow 3-5 inches! It said it on the forecast! We're getting out of school tomarrow!
That is so cool. 8 inches. I can't wait to tell everyone.
2 feet, he said. I can't wait for the first flake to hit an obscure point on the tip of a mountain.
Dang. 6 yards. It's going to be so cold...

 

Mommy! I finally got my hair bow out from under the couch!
That's nice, dear. How did you manage that?
I used the American flag from the top of the TV. Don't worry. I put it back.
You know you're not supposed to mess with that...
It's ok. I got most of the crusty stuff off of it.
What a way to disrespect our country.

 

(Psst: The last comic was like 10 years in the future or something. Sorry for the discrepancy)
Why is angsty such a funny word?
Well, crusty is a funny word. And sailors are crusty.
A person being crusty is usually considered a bad thing, but..
In Pirates of the Carribean, I'd like for one of those male protagonists to get crusty with me.
!

 

So then he said to me, "A bird in the hand makes blowing the nose difficult."
Ooh! That gives me another idea for a comic!
?
Is she always like that?
Is that a rhetorical question?

 

Meanwhile...
Argh.
Argh. Am I the best quality drawing here?
No. What about Joe?
Yeah! What about Joe?!
I'm the best quality drawing. My hat is shiny.
Yeah. Remember, 2 minutes.

 
LZOORUMEKSLKJHUH IZ A FLOTIN TORSO HEHE
Bring it on.

 

I keep looking at girls' boobs...subconsciously.
And is that different from any other day?
It's driving me crazy. I was talking to Samantha, and I swear, I couldn't stop peeking at her raisins.
Raisins...almost an insult.
She noticed it, and sometimes I didn't even know I was staring. But she understood.
To be great is to be misunderstood. To not be great...

 

I am definately surprised at the transformation that Brawny paper towels have gone through.
See, the old guy looked like a BRAWNY man. Muscular, mustache-clad...you know. BRAWNY.
This new guy looks like a metrosexual wearing a flannel shirt.
!

 

Oh my gosh, Dagmar. Look at her butt. It is like, so big!
No, actually, the ghetto booty happens to be right here.
I don't know anybody else who can do the perfect ghetto booty shake to "Yakko's 2 Note Song" from Animaniacs.

 

Just like old times when they used to sing on the bus...
I don't want, any-body else! When I think a-BOUT you I...
I don't want, any-body else! When I think a-BOUT you I...
Music centered around pornography is a leftist conspiracy to blah blah...yada yada yada...
I take it you don't want us to sing.
Later, singing quietly to himself...
When I think a-BOUT you I touch my-self, whoa-oa-oa...

 

Garlic Bread!
Grape Stomper!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

Why do all of my friends have a low self-esteem?
Actually, I don't.
I think it's pointless to beat yourself up because someone else has a better nose or something.
People should just accept the fact that I'm ugly and go on with their lives.

 

After building a comp...
I'm starting her up. Wait for it...
The suspense!
beep
POST!
POST!

 

Taking notes in US History...
Don't get medicare and medicaid mixed up. Medicaid is a type of financial aid for poor people-- Yes Dagmar?
That statement was politically incorrect.
...
:)
Medicaid is a type of financial aid for low-income families...
Thank you.

 

On the bus...
HI I'M LZOORUMEKSLKJHUH
HI I'M DAGMAR
WANNA BE FRIENDS?
SURE

 

On Stripcreator...
HI I'M ALEX
HI I'M DAGMAR
WANNA BE FREINS?
KAY

 

On the bus..
HI I'M HOT PANTS
HI I'M DAGMAR
WANNA BE FRNDS?
NO PROBLM

 

On Graal...
HI IM RYAN
HI IM DAGMAR
A/S/L?
WHAT?

 

The little girl is Noonie, the baby is Dagmar. (yes, Noonie is 5.5 years older)
O NO I HAVE A SISTR!
WANNA BE FRINS?
FART OMG LOLO

 

1 flake of snow has fallen. We are now announcing that school is closed for the day.
Woo!
The next day...
There is a blizzard trampling your town. However, we will not even delay the start of school today, even though there is an ubiquitous danger of sliding off the road and falling off of a cliff.
...
Now for your weekly gardening report!
The f word.

 

1.
Now that we're done here, is anyone up for a beauty pageant?
2.
Recount!
3.
I know I won, but there are just SO many things I could've improved upon...
grr...

 

So then you say to me, "I'm sorry, I'm not equipped to handle oversized loads!" HAHAHA AH HAH HAH!! This is rich. My comics are so great. They're the best! Right?
...
Brady should know better than to mess with his #1 fag hag.
Renée...I love you.
I'm sorry, I'm not equipped to handle undersized loads.
...I...Your glasses don't match your pants.
Your hair doesn't match your ass.

 

Excuse you...
Ahem...
What will it take to get you people to stop staring at the badly drawn triangles sticking out of my shirt?!

 

It helps that I always know what Brady's going to say... "I want to be blond..."
Renée, I have decided today that I want to be blond.
I want to be thin...
I want to be thin, dammit!
That guy over there is the cause of global warming...
Wow. That guy over there is the cause of global warming! Hunka hunka!

 

So I was in her shower, and I was looking around, and then I realized that there was not ONE THING in that ENTIRE bathroom that matched her shower curtain!!
Wow.
Everything was all blue and like a fish theme or something, but the shower curtain was BROWN. And I was looking around...
And you were going to die.
There HAS to be a disease on an unmatching shower curtain.
Such as supercilious antiphilus?

 

Brady, you will never guess what happened.
You got laid! Oh my gosh I'm so happy for you!!
Umm...not yet.
Damn. So what were you trying to tell me again?

 

Help!
What's the problem little mouse?
I'm a handsome prince turned into a mouse by an evil spell
I'll see what I can do about it.
You've been punked.

 

Help!
What's the problem little mouse?
I'm a handsome prince turned into a mouse by an evil spell
I'll see what I can do about it.
Crap.

 

The shower curtain was not BROWN, dammit, it was BURGUNDY.
Only you would care what shade it is.
Duh!
I think that I'm going to paint my bedroom a grayish purple color tomarrow.
Mauve, dammit, mauve.
sigh...

 

Help!
What's the problem little mouse?
I'm a handsome prince turned into a mouse by an evil spell
I'll see what I can do about it.
OMG LOLO IMA GREN SLYM THIGN WT A BRIGT GRN 4HED WTF HAHA
HEHE I CANT SEM 2 FND MY MAGACL POWRS OMG WTF

 

This is how it is in America: Women shave their legs because guys wouldn't do them otherwise.
If guys shave their legs, women don't do them.
Aww dang...brb. I gotta go put something on this rash on my legs.

 

Ryan, I can't find my mini razor.
Dang.
You mean that WASN'T a vibrator?

 

Ryan, if I were a sin, what would I be?
Lust.
...why lust?
Because I wanted to have sex with you.
Is that all?
...well...

 

The red headed dude is a 15 year old 8th grader.
Hey Dags, will you go out with me?
No.
I am a 16 year old junior.
Ok.
The next day...
You know, I had a dream about you last night. What do you think of kids?
Goats aren't really my thing. Why don't you tell that cowboy over there what the fuck you're talking about?

 

Oh my gosh, that is so glamorous. Do you FEEL pregnant?
Yeah. I don't remember whose it was though. We'll just see who it looks like when it pops out.
I feel sorry for the baby...
What do you think of Betty having a baby, Dagmar? Isn't it just so exciting?
I think this is where I screwed up.
Whore.

 

What I meant was, how are you going to pay for all the expenses of having a baby without a committed boyfriend and no help from your parents?
I don't really care about money. I'll just skip out on some of the expenses.
You're going to feed it, right?!
I thought that part of the deal was free.

 

So what are you going to name it?
Well, if it's a boy, I was thinking something like Mortimer. So everyone could call him Mort. Wouldn't that be cute?
Why not choose something that the kid wouldn't be picked on for?
Of course not.
Okay okay. Maybe I should call him Brainard, so everyone can call him Nard.

 

Betty, I think you should keep your grades up and go through college. That would be the best way to go.
Maybe if you didn't allow guys to shove their dicks so far into you that they fuck your brains out, you would get good grades.
!
...
That was supposed to be a thought bubble.
...

 

The #1 reason why Brady and Dagmar should never sing together.
You know you wanna do it
You know I wanna do it too
Out here on the dance floor
We can make sandwiches!
You know...I have absolutely no witty comment to insert here.

 

Dagmar, there's something I've always wanted to tell you.
Go ahead. I'm all ears.
You see, I've always wanted to drive over to your house one day and make sweet passionate love to you.
And then never speak to you again. But we would always have that one night.
Rejection...
Are you done now?
Yeah.

 

My Dags, I can't contain myself. Let's do it.
Okay.
Only if I can be the man.
:)

 

Brady: IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS...
No...
Brady: Oh. Well I have to go. Toodles!
Ok.
Omar: IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS HE ONLINE YET IS...
No...

Showing page 6.

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