All comics by BigFrank105

 

by BigFrank105
8-05-05
So then whut did y'all say ta him?
Ah called him an alcoholic, inbred, NASCAR lovin', gun totin' redneck!
Awww! Ah think its so sweet y'all be renewin yer vows!

 

by BigFrank105
8-07-05
Well, there's no doubt about it now...the killer is executing people who have committed one of the "seven deadly sins."
Wow, I'm impressed...that's some surprisingly clever detective work for a total fucking shit-for-brains dickhead like you, fuckface.
Thanks. I guess there's nothing left to do now but -- hey, wait a minute! "Fuckface"?
Hmm...I wonder who the next "seven deadly sins" victim will be?
Oh wow... I've never noticed how fucking hot you were... If I had my way I would mount you right now and fuck the unholy living SHIT out of you!
We have a winner!

 

by BigFrank105
8-09-05
Little boy, I am a prophet of God. Come unto me and you will be saved!
Okay!!!
Ewww! Dammit, you little bastard! That isn't what I meant!!!

 

Did you just pimp out my 9-year old sister?
Awwwwww f'sho!
by BigFrank105, 8-17-05

 

I'm gonna beat your ass, nerd!
Don't hurt me! I'm wearing my Captain Kirk underpants!
by BigFrank105, 8-17-05

 

by BigFrank105
8-17-05

 
by BigFrank105, 8-17-05

 
by BigFrank105, 8-17-05

 

CMERE YUO BITCH! TIME FOR SECKS!
by BigFrank105, 8-17-05

 

by BigFrank105
8-18-05
Hey Ryan, why do you always keep a tube of chapstick in your pants?
Shhh... I'm trying to make it seem like my penis is bigger than it actually is.
Err, at least I think I have one.
Well don't worry, I have a big enough cock for the both of us.
Alright, but remember to wear a condom this time. I don't want to catch syphillis again.

 

Stop staring at my tits, Link!
by BigFrank105, 8-18-05

 

by BigFrank105
8-18-05
Hey Chelsea, why the long face?
It's horrible, Ryan! Just horrible! I went to the doctor today and he told me I have 19 STD's!!!
Dear Lord! That's awful!
I would have thought that after sleeping with all those winos you'd at least be at 25!
At this rate I'm never going to break the record!

 

by BigFrank105
8-18-05
Chelsea, you're such a whore.
I mean, you truly are the dirtiest fucking whore I've ever met.
Even the nastiest, dirtiest whore in the whole world is like the Virgin Mary when compared to a nasty ass whore like you. Whore.
Awww... Thanks Ryan! You know how to make a girl feel special!

 

by BigFrank105
8-20-05
In this action packed episode, Bobby will be playing the role of a young, pretty blonde girl.
I really like you.
Thanks, I really like you too.
But my ex-boyfriend, who cheated and lied to me numerous times, wants to get back together. I think I should go with him.
Sounds reasonable.
Don't be mad, even though I know you have a lot of feelings for me.
Yeah, like right now I feel like gouging your eyes out with a melon baller.

 

by BigFrank105
8-23-05
This is the worst fucking job ever.

 

by BigFrank105
9-08-05
Vinter, bästa tiden på året.
Hejsan Snögubbe vill du ha en bulle?
Bullar? Är du dum eller? Snögubbar kan inte äta!
LURAD! Inte fan ska du få en bulle inte!
Well lookie here, Clem! Looks lahk we got us sum for-een-erz!
Ahll get the shotgun, paw!

 

by BigFrank105
9-12-05
When I grow up, I'm going to marry YOU, Mommy!
AWW! Heh-heh! Isn't that cute?
20 years later...
Well, Mom...it's time. Let's get married.
Huh?
Sweetie, you've been fucking me in the ass every night for the past 13 years. Marriage would only make things more complicated.

 

by BigFrank105
9-13-05
I, Varg Vikernes, of church burning, murderous, black metal fame, am the most EVIL of all!
No way! I Nergal, Sumerian god of plague, am the most EVIL of all!!!
Hey boys. I'm Paris Hilton.
OMG PARIS HILTON! LIEK GIVE MEH T3H SECKS0RZ LOL!!!
NO DEWD SHE IS LIEK GIVIN ME T3H SECKSORZ I HAEF A HUGE CAWK LOL.

 

by BigFrank105
9-13-05
What's been going on in the Superdome is terrible!
Oh geeze man, cut some slack.
The Saints haven't even played there yet.

 

by BigFrank105
9-25-05
That's IT! I'm going 40 days without jerkin' my yerkin. Starting NOW!!
I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH A TREE!!!

 

Well shit. This is the 104th large penised robot prototype that's exploded on me! Hopefully model #105 will be successful.
by BigFrank105, 9-29-05

 

by BigFrank105
10-09-05

 

by BigFrank105
10-09-05

 

by BigFrank105
10-12-05
Hey!
Hey!
You!
You!
Get off of my cloud!
Echoes get no respect these days...

 

by BigFrank105
10-12-05
This is odd... my left hand reeks eerily of fish!
This could explain why horny blind men keep trying to have sex with it!

 

by BigFrank105
10-27-05
Later...
I... I told you, bitch. You don't tell anyone about my disguise... And now look what happened to you... you gothic skank...
Now I'm going to need some way to dispose of the evidence.
BigFrank, this... thing you're serving me tastes like angst and razorblades.
Tastes like oregano to me. Now sit down and eat your fucking goth girl, er, steak.

 

by BigFrank105
11-01-05
Whoa, Pirate! I really like your costume!
Me too, Bobby! That costume is genius!
Wanna go throw some eggs at old people?
I thought we were spraypainting trick-or-treaters tonight.

 

by BigFrank105
11-28-05
Hoo-wee! Didja see that power bomb! It was intense! I love pro-wrestling!
Ugh... EVERYTHING about pro-wrestling is faked! The screams, the holds, all of it is a big sham to impress the audience.
Really? But I thought you loved the stuff!
How so?
As far as I hear, your girlfriend during sex is a lot like pro-wrestling.
Shut up! They're the best 10 seconds of her night!

 

by BigFrank105
12-07-05
And now, a message from Budweiser!
Beer. I love it. Especially when I'm thirsty. It really hits the spot!
There's nothing like a tall glass of beer with a nice big hamburger. No meal is complete without a beer!
Beer! The drink for the thirsty!
Because American beer is mostly water anyway!

 

by BigFrank105
12-11-05
GUESS WHAT, Mom? I just ASSASSINATED TED KENNEDY!
OH MY GOD, NO!!! NOOOOO!!!
Mommy, I'm PREGGANT! And WOOFY'S the daddy!
OH, HOW HORRIBLE!!! SOB!!!
MY ROAST! IT'S RUINED!!! Oh, I'm sorry kids. What did you say?

 

by BigFrank105
12-13-05
I hear the sewage treatment plant is holding a basketball tournament this weekend.
The sewage treatment plant? You've gotta be kidding me.
Yup. There's signs up for it all over town. Apparently a lot of people are doing it for a cash prize.
Doesn't sound too bad... What's it called?
"Poop Shoot 2005."
Count me in!

 

by BigFrank105
12-26-05
Ooooh yeah, baby... I 'm likin' what I'm seein' here... Oh God, oh God, this is hot! Ahh! Ahhh!!!
Hey Joey, Mom said to HOLY CRAP JOEY, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?
Jesus! Uh, Sally, this isn't what it looks like!

 

by BigFrank105
12-28-05
Well, the new year is finally upon us.
Mmhmm...
Is there anything this year that you're going to change in 2006?
My underwear.

 

by BigFrank105
2-17-06
I'm breaking up with you. Being single just sounds so much more appealing.
So you're giving me an excuse to get drunk and slut around?
No, I just don't want to be tied down while I have a good time with my girlfriends.
Exactly. Getting drunk. Slutting around.
Don't be a dick, this is what I want.
Okay then. Let's get drunk so I can feel you up in a drainage ditch.

 

by BigFrank105
2-21-06
So how was the date with Cindy?
Shit... Well, did you ever read the book "1984"?
Yeah.
And remember the scene where Winston and Julia are having sex and are caught by Big Brother?
Yeah...
Last night was just like that, except with a lot more broken bones and crying.

 

by BigFrank105
3-19-06
Yeah, so then we snorted a bunch of crack and went around looking for hookers.
Then we ended up finding a bunch of Mexicans, killing them, and stealing their crack and then passed out in a septic tank.
So you had a fun time at your Grandma's then?
You'd better fucking believe it.

 

by BigFrank105
3-21-06
Yo, I'm Fiddy Cent.
I'm a hardcore gangsta. From New York
I got capped and I have no talent.
But I'm a thug.
Arrrrrr.

 

by BigFrank105
3-23-06
Wa-hey kids! By new Choochiepals from Stickystuff Toys! They're awesome Choochie-fun!
COOL! I want to get a Choochiepal!
Hey mom! The TV said that Choochiepals were cool! How 'bout you buy me some?
NO! I'M SICK OF BUYING YOUR CHEAP PLASTIC SHIT! WE WENT THROUGH THIS SAME CRAP WITH YOUR "ROB LOWE" ACTION FIGURES!
Hey kids! If your parents won't buy you Choochiepals, FUCKING BURN DOWN THE LOCAL TOY STORE!
AWESOME!

 

by BigFrank105
3-23-06
Hey FUCKER! Give me all the Choochiepals you got, or I'll KILL ya!
B-b-but there are none left! They're all sold out!
FUCK! Well if you don't have any Choochiepals, I'll just have to BURN THIS PLACE DOWN!!!
GAHHH!!! MY SKIN!!!
OMIGOD! What have you done?
CHOOCHIEPALS, BITCH! I WANT 'EM ALL... OR I'LL FORNICATE YOU WITH A RUSTY LAMP POLE!

 

by BigFrank105
3-23-06
Now! On Action 3 News. A crazed young boy is burning down buildings all over the nations in order to acquire a toy. Reporter Chip Watson is at the scene.
Young man! Just why are you causing all this pandemonium!?
I do it for the fucking CHOOCHIEPALS! GIVE 'EM TO ME OR I'LL FUCKING BLOW UP THE FUCKING EARTH!
Mr. Stickystuff, what should we do about this situation.
We'll give him his damn Choochiepals... And may GOD help us all.

 

by BigFrank105
3-23-06
Okay, ya little bastard. This is ending right here.
Like HELL it is, old man! This ain't ending until I get what I fucking WANT!
Okay, fine, here. Here's $50,000 worth of Choochiepals shit. Ya HAPPY now?
Like FUCK I am!
What the fuck are you talking about?
Choochiepals are GAY! I'm all about the new "JOHN CANDY ACTION PLAYSET"! NOW DIE, FUCKER!

 

by BigFrank105
4-25-06
I'm a cop.
That gives me authority.
Suck my dick, bitch.
Dad, take off that costume.

 

by BigFrank105
4-25-06
Sometimes I like to coat myself with chocolate ice cream and roll around on the living room carpet while blasting my old "Oingo Boingo" albums.
It's because I'm a cop. Cops can do whatever the fuck they want.
It gets me really hot.
I can see your boner.

 

by BigFrank105
4-25-06
o/ Oooh baby I love your waaay! Wanna tell you I love your way! Wanna be with you night and day! o/
Why are you singing Peter Frampton?
Because I'm a cop. That gives me authority to do whatever the fuck I want, bitch. If I want to sing sad songs, I'll fucking sing sad songs.
Oh.
Hold me.

 

by BigFrank105
4-25-06
Hey there! Black person! You're under arrest!
Sir... That's a mannequin.
You win this time, nigger.

 

by BigFrank105
4-25-06
BITCH! I'M THE MOTHERFUCKING LAW!
Show me your titties.
No.

 

by BigFrank105
4-28-06
o/ After nine days I let the horse run free. 'Cause the desert had turned to sea o/
Get the fuck out of here already.
My iPod is still in your ass.

 

by BigFrank105
4-29-06
I'm bored.
Me too, what do you want to do!
I know! Let's play Jenga!
Yeah! Nothing catastrophic can happen from Jenga!
13 minutes later...
52 card pickup?
>sigh< - might as well ...

 

by BigFrank105
5-28-06
I saw an ad for Jose Cuervo that read "Good stories never begin with 'We were drinking Chardonnay when...'"
I totally agree with that.
Good stories begin with "So we were snorting coke off a dead hooker when..."

 

by BigFrank105
6-06-06
I need to go to the Post Orfice.
"Office."
Oh. Right. What did I say?
"Orfice."
Heheheheheheheh heheheheheheheh heheheheheheheh!!!
Heheheheheheheh heheheheheheheh heheheheheheheh!!! I'm so high.

Showing page 9.

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