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| Dear fellow Americans, are you tired of every convient store you go into looking like something out of an Al Queda Social Integration Training Manual? | |
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| Or having valuable grocery store shelf space being taken up by hummus and baba ganoosh, forcing out your favorite soft cheeses? | |
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| Or arrr, being afeared of encountering the most daunting beast on the road, the harried-arabic-minivan-driving mother? | |
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| Or listening to Arabic being spoken on TV? Or anywhere in your vicinity? | |
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| Or at having to look at swarthy people who are far less attractive than you? | |
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| OR...GLOB NOT KNOW...GLOB HATE BOMBY PEOPLE? | |
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