|
Dear Caligula, How do I get wine stains out of velvet? Signed, Alaina Vagimus
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 | |  |
| Dear Alaina, I would have your throat cut by the Praetorian Guard, and then direct your spurting blood over the wine stains thus concealing them. | |
 | |  |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| | |
| Thanks for writing. And especially for including your return address. | |
| | |
|
|
|
