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| ... And that's my reasoning as to why the elderly should be ground into a fine paste and fed to our cattle. | |
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| Thank you very much, professor. Now, to Alfonz Ciccone with sports, take it away. | |
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| We're here with Buck McBucklestein, world famous rodeo clown. How does it feel to come in first at the 32nd annual Jewish Rodeo Championships? | |
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| It feels great. I get all this prize money, plus all the latkes I can eat! I'd like to thank my big, Jewish family, my rabbi, and lastly God. But not Jesus. | |
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| Well, that's certainly fantastic. I'm going to go stab myself now, back to you, shitcraps. | |
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| Thanks for that touching story. On a lighter note, thousands dead after Marlon Brando ate a plate of refried beans. Details at eleven. | |
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