(Bunkster) Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I come to you live now from Lyam's "turf," where he's just signed a 3 year-8 dollar deal to be a giggolo. We're speaking now with his pimp, Deffeh
(Deffeh) Yea shit yo. I just signed my newest he-bitch. Man whore gonna make me a lot of money, G. He do all dat kinky shit.
(Bunkster) Mr. Deffeh, is it true that Lyam would even lick the peanuts out of my crap if I paid him a fresh 5 spot?
(Deffeh) Nigga please...dat mangina would do anything for a 5-spot. Please...you look right over there and that he-whore is...uhh....is that a cop car? Why's dat foo pointing dis way?
ZIIINNNGGG
(Deffeh) Uhhhh..........Bunkster? Where you at, G? Man, I thought we were boyz!
(ICY) Hey Bunkster, pass me that blue pen, will you?
(Bunkster) What for man? I have to stand on my hands. If I want to grab anything, I have to stand on my head and pick it up with my feet.
(ICY) I'm not entirely sure what you just said, but I'm working on my new comic, and I need the blue to make your ass look right.
(Bunkster) You know, if you weren't some freak, you could probably get it yourself.
(ICY) I can't believe you just called me a freak. What do you consider yourself?
(Bunkster) I've never thought of it, but my girlfriend refers to me as a tripod. Sometimes when she's really getting hot, she accidentally calls me ICY.
*BUUURP* You know there, sparky, I took you out for beers and a show. Where's my fuckin show?
Well, it was an hour away from showtime. I figured the show would last an hour, and I didn't want to stay out that late. And my name's not sparky...it's Rusty.
Yeah, I bet it IS rusty. You probably haven't oiled it in years. Every girl in the club wanted to sit on your lap and you wanted to leave after one beer?
I....I'm just saying... You could have taken a cab if you wanted to stay later.
How the fuck am I supposed to get any pictures of you with your head in a stripper's ass if you take off before the show starts?
Dirty rat bastard...making ghey comics about me when I'm not around... I'll show him.
I wonder if he saw my new comic strip?
Heh......yeah..um......good to be back. *FAAAAAAAAAART*
Wow! The grease in that fart alone has penetrated all my moving parts and has eliminated the need for me to get a chassis greasing for 3 years. Not only that, but it tastes great, too!
I hate my penis, Dr. Bunkster. It's a vile, shriveled little vermin and makes me do bad things.
No problem, m8. Just lie down over there on the couch, relax and tell me all about it.
So, when did all this start?
Well, it was about 3 years ago, really. I was working at Pizza Hut and the manager told me to take this big ball of warm dough out to the dumpster. I stuck my hand in and picked it up. Warm, I say
So you fucked a ball of pizza dough! So what?! Lyam fucked a jar packed full of my shit.
Damn, you're a good therapist. I feel less pathetic already.