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| Hi, and welcome back to the Newsbeat this October 17, 2125. | |
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| The weather today is expected to be dark brown with a chance of mottled purple later in the evening. Winds will be gusting between "bone breaking" and "eviscerating". | |
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| Acid storms will be mild, but large oxygen holes are expected to move into the area this afternoon, so be sure to pack extra rebreather cartidges. | |
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| In a completely unrelated story, industrial leaders continue to insist that global warming is a myth. | |
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| "We're still waiting for all the science to come in. " claimed one leader from his orbital hydroponic garden. | |
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