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| I'm Shotaro Kaneda. I'm the hero of this piece, and I must stop my friend Tetsuo from destroying Neo-Ipswich... | |
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| I am the aforementioned friend that Kaneda speaks of. I have psychic powers, and must search out the mythical Ikea, who is more powerful than I... | |
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| Look, it's a fucking swedish furniture store. Why bother? | |
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| Well, I'm scheduled to turn into a blob any minute now, so I'd better scrap that idea. | |
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