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| I like to help people. That's just the kind of guy I am. | |
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| Take two weeks ago, for instance. I went to the sperm bank and made a donation. | |
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| That was all well and good, but now I'm on their mailing lists. Their always sending me fliers saying "Supplies are dangerously low on filing clerk sperm!' | |
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| They send emails too. 'Would you like to produce more sperm?' 'Discount ink jet cartridges for your sperm' It's getting out of hand. | |
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| "Dear Stickdude, in hopes that you will visit your local sperm bank soon, we sent you a free cigarette!"...Arnt you big for a cigarette? | |
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| Someone masturbated in tobacco and I came out! | |
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