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| LOUIE ANDERSON STIRRING COFFEE WITH HIS PENIS | |
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| Thusly, spacemen landed in Starbucks and planted their flagseed in the recycler. | |
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| And made it so that every woman who drank Starbucks became pregnant with a little alien child, repopulating theearth in a matter of days. | |
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| And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. | |
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