All comics by JackFeldstein

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A WRITER'S LIFE by Jack Feldstein
I've got a great idea for your script....blah, blah, blah, blah ...
Interesting. Those who can't write...nag the writer to death with their ideas instead.
by JackFeldstein, 4-27-14

 

I've got a great idea for your script....blah, blah, blah, blah ...
Interesting. Those who can't write...nag the writer to death with their ideas instead.
by JackFeldstein, 4-27-14

 

I've got a great idea for your script....blah, blah, blah, blah ...
Interesting. Those who can't write...nag the writer to death with their ideas instead.
by JackFeldstein, 4-27-14

 

I've got a great idea for your script....blah, blah, blah, blah ...
Interesting. Those who can't write...nag the writer to death with their ideas instead.
by JackFeldstein, 4-27-14

 

Next time, when I choose a DVD to watch on a grey and rainy day... I should avoid "August: Osage County".
by JackFeldstein, 4-30-14

 

In 1884, Nietzsche said God was dead.
It's 2014. Nietzsche is dead. What's your point?
by JackFeldstein, 4-30-14

 

by JackFeldstein
4-30-14
In 1884, Nietzsche said God was dead.
It's 2014. Nietzsche is dead. What's your point?
Aren't you worried your whole life's purpose may be meaningless?
Do I look worried to you?
It's hard to tell... you and I are stock characters from an online "make a comic" website.
So that's why I can't move!

 

by JackFeldstein
4-30-14
In 1884, Nietzsche said God was dead.
It's 2014. Nietzsche is dead. What's your point?
Aren't you worried your whole life's purpose may be meaningless?
Do I look worried to you?
It's hard to tell... you and I are stock characters from a "make a comic" website.
So that's why I can't move!

 

by JackFeldstein
5-01-14
In 1884, the philosopher Nietzsche said God was dead.
It's 2014. Nietzsche is dead. What's your point?
Aren't you worried your whole life's purpose may be meaningless?
Do I look worried to you?
It's hard to tell... you and I are stock characters from a "make a comic" website.
So that's why I can't move!

 

by JackFeldstein
5-01-14
In 1884, the philosopher Nietzsche said God was dead.
It's 2014. Nietzsche is dead. What's your point?
Aren't you worried your whole life's purpose may be meaningless?
Do I look worried to you?
It's hard to tell... you and I are stock characters from a "make a comic" website.
So that's why I can't move!

 

by JackFeldstein
5-04-14
You know you're a writer...when you read the subtitles even when the documentary has English bits.
And you find yourself editing those subtitles.
And the documentary you write in your head is much better. Because in your version the boring and self-pitying protagonist kills himself 10 minutes in.

 

by JackFeldstein
5-09-14
The beauty of being a writer is that you can conjure cool stuff in your head.
Though sometimes what's in your head seems spookily real.
The feeling's mutual, conjured hipster writer wanna-be.

 

by JackFeldstein
5-12-14
Caught the MODERN FAMILY ep set in Australia. Phil was attacked by creatures. Gloria said Vegemite funny. The immature boys looked for nakedness at Bondi and Haley was chatted up by surfer dudes.
Interesting how cliches never stop being funny.
Very post-post-post modern.
Or rather, neo-absurdist ...The "dingo stole my baby" joke. It mined deep into the collective unconscious.
I thought there was an overuse of pixilation...
The trick is to squint your eyes.

 

by JackFeldstein
5-14-14
I'm giving up being a poet to become a nuclear physicist.
That's quite a paradigm shift.
I have the experience. A poet's life is like Heisenberg's uncertainty principle...plus he's better dead though he's alive just like Schrodinger's cat.
I have no idea what you're talking about.
Totally prepared for that. It's exactly what everyone says about my poems!

 

by JackFeldstein
5-15-14
Life is so mysterious. Like why is it always "i" before "e" except after "c"?
It's not. Think "Species", "Science", "Sufficient".
But it always is when the sound says "ee".
No it isn't. Think "Fancier".
Wow! Life is even more mysterious than I thought. 'Cause there are no rules.
Can we go to the beach now?

 

No-one takes me seriously.
by JackFeldstein, 5-17-14

 

by JackFeldstein
5-20-14
Often I worry about if Virginia Woolf lived in Bushwick...would she have been for or against gentrification?
I worry about the same thing with James Baldwin.
I guess we'll never know.
It's hard having writer heroes.
Maybe I should stick to Cat Woman.
And I'll go back to Spider Man.

 

by JackFeldstein
5-21-14
What's wrong buddy? You look depressed.
I'm lamenting the demise of real books...Books you could feel, smell and use as doorstops....Not like ebooks.
I haven't read a book since High School. I always wait till they make the movie...where they cut out the boring bits.
!
Like Harry Potter movies, for instance.
Now I'm just generally lamenting.

 

by JackFeldstein
5-21-14
What's wrong buddy? You look depressed.
I'm a writer. And I'm lamenting the demise of real books...Books you could feel, smell and use as doorstops....Not like ebooks.
I haven't read a book since High School. I always wait till they make the movie...where they cut out the boring bits.
Like Harry Potter movies, for instance.
Now I'm just generally lamenting.

 

by JackFeldstein
5-26-14
Alien Being! Do not laser me! I offer you your heart's desire.
I'm an alien. I have no heart.
I was speaking metaphorically.
What's the price?
Your soul.
To remind you, I'm an alien., so I have no soul. Besides, you think I haven't read FAUST? Die, demon, die!

 

by JackFeldstein
5-26-14
Alien Being! Do not laser me! I offer you your heart's desire.
I'm an alien. I have no heart.
I was speaking metaphorically.
What's the price?
Your soul!
To remind you...I'm an alien. I have no soul. But I do dream of being a writer. Which means I've read FAUST. So how about I offer you the green gooey stuff inside me instead?

 

by JackFeldstein
5-27-14
Mark Twain
Oscar Wilde
Let's stop arguing over who's the funnier writer. Besides, why does it matter if what you think is right...or whether what I think is right?
My therapist says that we need to be right due to a fear of our inevitable death...causing a compulsion of narcisstic fantasies about immortality... manifested through what we think.
Let's go back to arguing about who's the funnier writer... Mark Twain.
Oscar Wilde.

 

by JackFeldstein
6-05-14
Sometime I wonder what it would be like to be old.
Dude, you shouldn't think about bad stuff like that. It could limit your sense of fun and reckless abandon.
I have no sense of fun. Or reckless abandon. I have a giant college loan, a degree in English Lit with a PhD on Kafkaesque nihilism... and no job.
So...when you're ....75
I'll have paid my college loan because $1 will be worth 1 cent , have no job because I'll be retired. forgotten about Kafkaesque nihilism. And that's when fun and reckless abandon should kick in.
Awesome, dude! I can't wait either!

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