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| "Dear Bilbo Baggins: Congratulations! Your nephew Frodo has been selected to be the Student Ambassador to Mordor!" | |
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| "This once-in-a-lifetime opportunity will no doubt prove to be a most educational and enriching experience for him!" | |
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| "Please sign this waiver releasing People to People from any injuries or fatality your nephew may receive . . ." | |
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| ". . . during his journey to Mordor or during his stay there. We are not responsible for attacks by Black Riders, Orcs, Cave Trolls, Balrogs or Giant Spiders." | |
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| "Attached is also information on the time and place to attend the meeting to learn more about this once-in-a-lifetime trip for your nephew." | |
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| "Bring money. Lots of it. We know you can afford it. Word is that you're the richest SOB in the Shire. Yours truly, People to People" | |
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