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| Mr. President, Alaska is now the crime capital of our Country! | |
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| Fine! Fine! Have Mike Dunleavy come to my office. | |
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| I hear you can't keep those damn native Inuits in line up there, Governor! Now "I" gotta do it for ya! | |
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| But sir, I know you'll come up with a hugely great plan for the people there! | |
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| Hands up, you badass Eskimo! I been sent by POTUS to stop your crimewave & five stinkin' dollars won't buy me off! | |
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| No? Tell Donny it's been plenty enough to buy BJs from Ivanka! | |
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