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| When I was little, my mother hated me and she still does. She used to throw me on the streets and make me beg for money. | |
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| I said "Mom, you look like an ass and smell like the indide of one". She slapped me and I never saw her since. | |
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| But the saddest thing was when I was seventeen. My girlfriend was cheating on me with the football coach just because he had tree trunk legs. | |
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