All comics by LameLoLsCatt

Profile

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
I need to get my girlfriend a Valentine's Day present
why?
So she thinks that I love her
What are you gonna get her?
A video game
.....

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
I was expecting to see a donkey
me too
That's just a beagle spray painted gray
They did a great job training him to hold that pin pong paddle
This is what you get for booking a two for one vacation through Mexpedia.com
Ooo..they even trained him to eat the bubbles

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
What seems to be the problem officer?
I'm stopping you for speeding.
But, I wasn't even driving.
You didn't answer my question.
You didn't ask me a question.
Are you threatening me?

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
Hey der Eddie, So whut Santa get cha fur Christmas?
Billy, I'm atheist
Whut do dat mean..atheist?
It means i don't believe in Christ.
Well I asked you bout Santa son, was't you listenin.
......

 

Officer, I can explain...
by LameLoLsCatt, 12-31-10

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
You are awesome...
You are great...
You're a real winner...

 

Arg
Uh, guys I think you teleported the wrong Captain
by LameLoLsCatt, 12-31-10

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
Janet, baby, I'm sorry...It just slipped right off
Well maybe you shouldn't have gotten all cocky, thinking you were gonna fit a standard sized Trojan
I know..I was just trying to impress you
Jet, just tell me you'll always be there for me and Jet Jr.
ZZzzz..
Jet...?

 

by LameLoLsCatt
12-31-10
you didnt see anything, right?
yes daddy!, i saw you wrestlin with the basketball player...
ohh boy...

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-01-11
look Jesus, I didn't move in just because the view is great
whats that suppose to mean, Jim?
Oh, don't get coy with me Jew boy..you know exactly what i am talking about
I thought you liked playing "Heal Blind Jim with the Miracle Anal Mouse"
Well, next time you should ask before you go surprising me with a healing anal mouse
Geez, when did you become such a fag

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-01-11
Yea! This my jam!...♪Domo...Domo♪
No, not this song again
What's wrong?
Every wedding DJ plays this damn song and it just brings back haunting memories of my time as a prison guard.
But it's so catchy
Kilroy! You used me!

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-01-11
I'm so embarrassed, that has never happened to me before
You damn masked psycho killers are all the same
Like we haven't heard that one before.
What? He looked promising in the ad.
I don't know why I ever left Jesus for you.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-01-11
Fish Porn Interviews
So tell me a little bit about yourself.
Well, I've been in a lot of films. I played the third minnow to come out of that asian girl's ass in "I Love the Fishes"
NO WAY! That was you?
I was also the stunt double for Nemo's dad in Finding Nemo.
You're gonna be great in my film, "Chocolate Covered Fish Sticks" Staring Kanye West.
Dude, I gotta draw the line somewhere.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-03-11
So, what's the problem now Jim?
Gee, I don't know Meeky. I'm sure it has nothing to do with you and Jesus having coffee the other day talking about the inheritence.
You know what Jim, if I would have known you were gonna turn into such a lil bitch, I would have never talked you into moving in with me and the J man
"The J Man"? I remember when you use to call me that!
Really Jim, You're turning into a real fag.
I'm so eating nothing but corn for the next three weeks! You insensitive woodland prick!

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-03-11
HI! Welcome to The Fap! How can I help you today?!
gggraddhinnn
Here at The Fap we want to make sure you have a fabulous shopping experience and walk away feeling like a confirmed member of society!
gggrrnnamdbjk
Oh my God! You look SO fabulous!

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-04-11
Corn Regret
ARRRRRGGGG!OOHHH MMmm...Ahhhh...
Fucking nasty Jim.
Damn it Jim, now I'm gonna have to change out of my cross.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-04-11
Parental Advice 01- Baptizing Your Kids
When you going to Baptize your kids?
I'm not going to.
WHAT?! Geez, you prolly not going to talk to them about Jesus either.
I'm not going to.
You hate God, that why your life so messed up.
Sigh...For someone that loves Jesus so much, she is so freakin evil....

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-04-11
Free babysitting has its cost 1
Mom, can you babysit the boys for me I need to look for a job.
Why?
I..just..told you. i need to look for a job.
I don't really know. I don't know how to raise kids.
What do you mean? You have three kids, and you want to be a foster parent.
Well, look at you.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-04-11
Free babysitting has its cost 2
Boom Tarat Tarat...WoW WoW WEEE!
...
...
Watch Lola watch TV.
What did you guys do today?

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-04-11
Love Advice 1
You need to pind a guy that is smart to take care op you. Not like those oders guys you always like.
Benji is highly intelligent.
I'm...standing right here.
I bet he doesn't eben go to nursing school. Your cousins go to nursing school and they are berry berry smart.
Are you saying I should date my cousins?

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-05-11
Filipino Phone Calls 1
mm..mmm Oo. Oo. Mm mm. Oo. Oo.
balitang kutsero
hey mom, who ya talking to?
Be quiet. I'm talking to the Philippines.
mabigat ang loob

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-05-11
Filipino Phone Calls 2
MAKITID ANG ISIP. MAHINGNA UMUNAWA WALANG MASYADONG NALALAMAN
Oo. Mm.Mm Oo.
Mom, why are you talking so loud?
Beecoos, I'm talking long distance to the Philipines.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-05-11
Getting the Homeless off...the streets
Ahhhh...nothing like peeing in the street.
Whoa... he has a golden gift from God.
Hey there bummy, you've got a real gift there. How does a job sound?
Do you do any handiwork?

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-06-11
I'm writing you a ticket for possession of pot.
But I have a prescription and it's legal now.
The Government changed their mind, they just wanted to mess with you hippies cause you keep whining about your SSI.
Look! That menacing Kangaroo is holding a gun.
Kangaroo gun possession is still ok.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-06-11
I think this year I will kill less.
Yeah, I'm gonna try to stop being such a bum.
Could you spot me for tonight?
Who keeps those things anyways.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-06-11
Home Improvement
Pilipino PedEx. How may I halp you?
I need to ship a large package to the Philipines.
Ok ma'am. I can halp you with dat ma'am. Can you describe the Fackage to me ma'am.
Well it is 5'5", 160 pounds or so, and it never shuts the fuck up!

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-07-11
Hi, baby how are you?
me rove you rong time
Is everything ok baby, you sound so distant
you use up arr youl flee minutes
I love phone dating you, you totally get me.
you owe me fie dorra mole mutha fukka

 
by LameLoLsCatt, 1-07-11

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-13-11
Hmmm....
Irony, baby, why are you being so funny?
I don't know..You didn't even "Like" my status today, but you LMAOed Stacy's Status
What?! I didn't see your status update! It must be my stupid phone. You know I wish there was a "LOVE" button, I'd love your status everyday....now just put my penis back in your mouth..
ugh..whatever..I need to make my new status about what a dick you are

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-13-11
Free Babysitting Has its Cost- based on true events
Hey, mom this one time my teacher had a mouse and put it in this guys bottom, then the mouse saw all his friends, and then the guy threw him up out his mouth.
Whaa...????
Yeah! Mom!
Was this on a cartoon?
sigh...I can't believe I have to explain to her why not all cartoons are for children...

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-13-11
Let me just check my Facebook really quick before I write that paper on Blackholes
"lol". "Like"."Like". ew..Stacy cut her hair.."Like". OMG...I can't believe she tagged me in theses pics
3 Hours Later
CRAP! I forgot to write my paper.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-14-11
The New Zodiac
Irony, baby, is everything ok?
Well, I use to be an Aquarius but now I am finding out that I am really a Capricorn.
Ok...so what.
That means we use to be perfectly compatible, because you use to be a Gemini but now you're a Taurus. And I just need to be with some one I make sense with.
None of what you just said made any sense.
See! Before, you use to totally get me!

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-14-11
Hey cutie, so what's your New sign?
You know that stuff is just completely silly and not backed up by any scientific or observational evidence, right?
yeah, so.
But, you're still smoking hot. so you should come worship me on Sundays.
Mmm Kay!
Righteous

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-16-11
What seems to be the problem Sir?
You were going a lil fast back there.
Aren't you county police?
Ya, so.
Well, I don't believe you have Jewisdiction in the area.

 

Monkey Loves Kangaroo
But I love you
by LameLoLsCatt, 1-17-11

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-19-11
Another Medical Marijuana Dispensary was raided by Metro officers today.
They seized several containers of marijuana and arrested 4 employees.
Meanwhile in other news, gang related rapes are still on the rise.
And Fentanyl claims another victim due to overdose.
To conclude our evening news, unemployment will no longer be available due to lack of State funds.
I would go home to smoke a bowl after hearing all this awful news, but my dealer was arrested today.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-19-11
So what did you do last night?
Oh, just put the kids to bed, then medicated and went to sleep.
Isn't marijuana illegal?
It's really a grey area now.What did you do?
I got really drunk then blew my entire paycheck on black jack, but the night ended well when a stripper willing went home with me.
and I get shit for liking pot

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-19-11
Some Where in Alabama
I needs ya to mor the lawn compadre
que?
Our new govna wants me to be more acceptin of yer, so I wants ta pay ya to mor this here lawn
que?
yer name's Jesus ain't it?
que?

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-19-11
Alright Bently, my ratings are really starting to go down.
Make me governor and I pomise you I can change that.
Done and done. You shall be governor of Alabama then.
In recent news, the new governor of Alabama receives heavy criticism for his acceptance speech involving Jesus.
Ahhh...I love hearing my name in the news.

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-20-11
This comic sucks alien balls
Check this out- Sexual Encuntors of the 4th Kind!
Are those aliens having a daisy chain
Hell yeah!
Why is this a turn on for you?
MORPH!
uhm...we need to talk.
You're cheating on me aren't you

 

by LameLoLsCatt
1-25-11
For Miss Bee
Hi! BABY! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! I LOVE SYKPING WITH YOU! I WILL NEVER HURT YOU BABY I LOVE YOU TOOOOO MUCH!
awww...i love you too, just promise you wont ever break up with me via Skype okay?
I promise baby. I love you too much to do that. Shit baby, I love you too much to even break up with you...in fact I'm gonna come visit you
♥♥♥
Who the hell are you?
I'm Dumandoh.. I know I look a lil different in real life...but baby I love you! we can do anything to make it work.

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