All comics by Miller12

 

by Miller12
4-25-17
What's up with the Stiff ?
Boss! It appears to be an apparent suicide, but I can't figure out why Madame Trussauds called and wants to know his shoe size.
HA,have you heard of the waxing moon?Let's just get on with the tour of the wax museum. My bowel cleanse is starting to work it's magical wonder!
Serving as your State Custody Counselor and Aroma Therapist. The Wall. I am using lavender essential oil to kill the smell embalming fluid.
Valley Of The Kings & Pyramid
SHIT! All this time I thought it was the arabian coffee.What do you think of three sheets to the wind therapy?
Docbill! It states right here that this Handsome Stiff decided to live a rogue nomad lifestyle and wants to be cremated.His remains are to be scattered over Egyptian Soil

 

AH! 👑
🔥💥💦🌟🏆
by Miller12, 4-27-17

 

by Miller12
5-01-17
💌💒💐
Get a load of roadside assistance.Jesus... is the only way to God! Damn! GPS keeps recalculating...
We are in between Roadside Bombs and Weed Maps.My educated guess is that number will lead us straight to Book Of John!
The Great Escape 😈

 

by Miller12
5-08-17
No Shit Sherlock! 🐾🐾🐾🐾
Inspector! If you came here to retrieve my whip It has vanished without a trace!
Microscopic details are important 👀
SHAMPOO is playing on HD TV 💻
Why would a bald dominatrix need shampoo?

 

by Miller12
5-09-17
Breaking news just came across our desk.Proving it's not all Unicorns and Fairytale Stories! 👡
One coffee shop is suing another coffee shop for imitating their Princess style colorful latte claiming trademark!🍨
There goes the neighborhood !🏠
Please ! Could someone on the set bring my morning coffee and don't forget the Keto Bomb ketogenic creamer for dramatic effect! Today's Unified Latte delivers the good news.☕
Best coffee in town!🍵
Tooms! Tonight's breaking news story.Corporate thugs on a mug campaign👫

 

Fairy, When I say It's a unicorn It's a Unicorn! 👍
Potus Halo 💫 📯 🎠
by Miller12, 5-09-17

 

by Miller12
5-11-17
Welcome to Jenni's massage parlor.Would you like sprinkles or jimmies on your icecream? 🍦
Sugar plum fairy princess! I'll have jimmies and a cherry on top. 🍒
Welcome to Jenni"s massage parlor.Would you like me to show you how to handle an Avacado ? 👳
I am here to check the sprinkler system. 🚿
Potus! That' is how we build a wall. 🗿

 

Potus Flower🌸 Phreaky 's Protein Mac & Cheese Muscle. 💪
I came 😗 I saw 🔮 Conquered ! 💣
by Miller12, 5-12-17

 

by Miller12
5-13-17
Big Dave!Take no prisoners and your body language should suggest no one is getting over the wall!
Not unless they want to be a Roosevelt trophy piece and have their head mounted on the wall! 👽
Illegial Alien! Are you the stone wall Fortress Monitor?
I am an International Hunter Of Big Game! 🐻
👣👣👣Tracking Enthusiast! made the honor roll and have enough ammunition to Reload. 🚀
🐰"It's just like shooting squirrels only these squirrels have guns". Guardianship ! 🐇

 

by Miller12
5-14-17

 

Earth Mother ♍
WITCH! I am here for the scalp treatment. 💆
Holy Poop! 💩
by Miller12, 5-14-17

 

by Miller12
5-18-17
Five dollar make you baller!
Buddha Babes Say see no evil,hear no evil and speak no evil!🙈🙉🙊
🐵Monkey! Do you want to spy for Asian Royal Family?
Would that make me an extraordinary King? 🐒
In the name of Buddha!
In the name of America✔you can rub my belly and bring on my bottle feeding! 🍸🍺🍷🍹

 

by Miller12
5-19-17
Five dollar make you baller!
I slept with your Buddha Bribes and the deal is a deal!Five dollar make you taller!
Five dollar make you taller! 🎓
Their all the same size lying down.🔬
Have you seen my magnificent glass Slippers?👠
My Tie Sir ! 👔

 

by Miller12
5-21-17
PREAKY! That is a creative way to wear an expensive tie.
PREAKY! Why hang when you can swing on the line of royal succession.
Sir Monkey! Thanks for teaching me how to tie one on.
Have I ever showed Celtic Pride? 🐉

 
by Miller12, 5-21-17

 

by Miller12
5-24-17
Potus Pilot! ✈
Sister Ann! 😇
Let's Share Christ With The World. 📰
GRANDEST Style! ✌
Your political timing is impeccable. How about sharing that vintage bottle of Vatican wine you pulled from the bottom of the barrel.
You would be surprised what you find behind a hole in the wall! 🌍

 

GNOME! I might have to charge a beard tax. 🐑
by Miller12, 5-24-17

 

by Miller12
5-24-17
Hello America!🙋 Today a man was acquitted for choking his girlfriend to death with his big penis !
Setting a new standard for future generations and giving new meaning to the "Choke Out." 😲
Now I am a true believer ! 📏

 

by Miller12
5-24-17
Captain Poop Your Pants ! 💩
Wirthling! You don't look like the profile picture I chose from the website "pick your own chamber maid." 💄
I have no gag reflux!
Poop Smells Like Roses ! 🌷

 
by Miller12, 5-25-17

 

by Miller12
5-25-17

 

Hypnotic Intervention Techniques are being used to seduce the the mind, body and spirit .
Upperclassmen need some sort of therapeutic handling! 👐
by Miller12, 5-25-17

 

by Miller12
5-25-17
Since when does a baby get to choose his own changing nurse?
I don't want a close encounter with the bride or groom of Godzilla.
You passed the monkey see monkey do test. Catapulting you into outlaw territory! 🐙
Reading my rights.📚
🆗 Sugar Lips! I am your visiting nurse. How many times do I have to change your diaper until you go poop on the potty like a big boy?
At this rate my gender is undecided! 🚻

 

Yes! We have all the bananas. We have all the bananas today.🍌
by Miller12, 5-25-17

 

MONKEY! How do you suppose we slow down the ageing process?
Welcome to my Hyperbaric Oxygen Chamber!
by Miller12, 5-26-17

 

by Miller12
5-28-17
What is worse than a gang of bully dyke lesbians trying to infiltrate the school system? 🐂
A gang of bully gay queers trying to teach protocol. 🐂
Dyke!
Queer!
The book club presents "How to become a gender profile analyst in three easy steps"! 💑
Step 1:Know your genitalia.Step 2: Stay out of the public bathhouse. Step 3:Beware of the dog! 🐕

 

Butch!We have the right to bear arms!
Orientation Orient !
by Miller12, 5-28-17

 

by Miller12
5-28-17
Today's classroom We will be talking about the swimsuit edition of underage drinking,unprotected sex and STD awareness!@👙
A List: The Aristocrats,The Upperclassmen and The Nobles!
B List : Brains, Brawn and Brothels!

 

by Miller12
5-28-17
C List: Caught in the act and released on own recognizance under police supervision!
D List: Devils! 👺
Delinquents! 👿
E List: The Eucharist Christ! 👻

 

Who's going to lead this parade? You can park your hot rod in my station as long as I get to choose my own pen pal.! 📬
Captain! Your Dungeon,My Dragon and a Halo to distract the guard's while I polish off all the doughnuts! 🍩
by Miller12, 5-28-17

 

Kajun Spicy Fries!🍟 What brings you here today?
The Englishmen are getting say a head start on the Memorial Celebrations!🔖
by Miller12, 5-28-17

 

Violet,We are driving over the statutory speed limit! 💯
Statutory speed limit is set on cruise control.I promise I won't call rape if you pass me a double bacon cheese burger! 🍔
by Miller12, 5-28-17

 

by Miller12
5-28-17
Boys&Girls💏 Let's get this party started right. 🎡
Genital Warts! 📖
Gonorrhea,Syphilis,Chlamydia,Herpes, Hepatitis!
HIV Rapid Screening ! 🎢
Wiguhooker! I Can't seem to recall what I did last night or how got a piece of chalk up my arse! 🌈
Wigurube! If you think you like me now wait until metapause! 🔔

 

Hellions! Who are thrill seekers and are on the high risk sex watch alert please seek immediate medical attention!
Dochappy! I found a shank in the classroom! 🔪
by Miller12, 5-28-17

 
by Miller12, 5-28-17

 
by Miller12, 5-29-17

 

by Miller12
5-29-17

 

Hark who goes there Where art thou Heathens?
Human PSYCHOLOGICAL Velocity!
by Miller12, 5-29-17

 

🆓INOCULATIONS On The House Of Representatives! 🚑
by Miller12, 5-29-17

 

by Miller12
5-30-17
Meanwhile Back In Martha's Kitchen.
UTI:Urinary Tract Infection,BI:Bladder Infection, and Candida are the three most common names in every american household! 🍴
For all your baking needs.🍞
Candida! Is the fancy name for Yeast Infection.If that isn't enough to make you want to abstain from sexual intercourse than meet our dinner guest and Spokesman Chef . 🍰
Chef! I would like Apple Pie for dessert. 🍎
George's New Apprentice.
GILROY MD! Exactly the look for someone trying to teach success! 😷
George! I exchanged bodily fluids with a stranger and woke up in ICU: Intensive Care Unit with a chicken strapped to my waist! 🐣

 

My Honored Guests! Let me pull out a chair. 💺
by Miller12, 5-30-17

 

Utopia
Honest Abe! Brief me on all those chickens who flew the coop !
by Miller12, 5-30-17

 

by Miller12
5-30-17
Today's essay is about photography and how one night of heated passion mixed with alcohol can lead to very bizarre behavior! 🙌
The porn pirate took a picture of me when I was drunk and said he wanted to take a picture of my beautiful body! 🙆
Blonde! Perfect example, When a horny toad 🐸 whips out a digital camera during sex and says smile he has ulterior motives! 📷
Blue! Smart phone pictures can easily be erased and they are stored in a cloud. 📱
My Leading Lady! that's what you were doing when you said you were eating BON BON's ! 🎥
My Leading Man! My stripcreator career began with one hitchhiker taking all bets! 🃏

 
by Miller12, 5-31-17

 

by Miller12
5-31-17
There has been a Waldo sighting smack dab in the middle somewhere between the USA and North Korea!
The vicodin, adderall,valium, xanex cockpit stress reliever rescue inhaler made me fall asleep while manning the spaceship.Thank God! for auto pilot. We won't be blowing triple zero!
Airsuit ! We will be back in American airspace just in time for our tee off at 12:00 Christ Time!

 

by Miller12
6-01-17
The leader of the free world pulled out of the climate agreement.
Global warming is worldwide.Oh God!
Hot as hell!
Are you up for another supersonic landing?

 
by Miller12, 6-01-17

 
by Miller12, 6-02-17

 

by Miller12
6-03-17
Afro! We will have to go to Russia if we want to take the hypersonic missiles out for a spin.
Nerd! Making supersonic missiles obsolete. How do you suppose the Russians have access to such advanced technology?
Well, if what they say is true and Hitler got his military aircraft technology from the Aliens then Putin is Reptilian Hybrid! 👾
It's cold as ice in Russia! unless your accompanied by a beautiful woman on her kness to ease political tensions!

 

by Miller12
6-03-17
Purple Panty's in your purse! Who's running the brothel? The neighbors have been complaining about loud music and want answers!
Officer! I assure you this is not a brothel it is a bar with a festive atmosphere. My name is Lara.
Yeah, that's what it looks on the surface.I am sure if I take a look around this joint I will find some hanky panky going on.The back doors lead to where?
Oh! those doors are eyebrow waxing rooms for family and friends. An occasional bikini wax but nothing noteworthy!
Eyebrow waxing! Laura my wifey says I have a unibrow and that a wax would make me look less stern and bring out my facial features! Damn! Tattoo! my wife and I got the same matching tattoo!
Maestro Please !

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