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| Attention Earthlings living along a geodesic path extending from Salem Oregon to Charleston South Carolina! | |
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| In three days time our Zaxxonian God will display his displeasure with you by making your sun disappear. | |
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| The only way to appease him and bring back your lifegiving orb is to send your most attractive females to us for anal probing and insemination. | |
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| I just love screwing with these primitive cultures. | |
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| Hey I just thought of something! We should launch a microscopic black hole into their sun to make it actually go dark! | |
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| OMG! That would be hilarious. They would totally crap their pants. | |
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