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| If I had a nickel for every time I rubbed one out in this bathroom while on the clock, I’d be up to $1.15 | |
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| Ugh! That’s incredibly disgusting. Why are you telling me this? | |
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| Add 40 cents for all of the times in your cubicle when you called in sick | |
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| Dude, seriously? What the hell is wrong with you? | |
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| And finally 15 more cents for the times next to this window where your wife showers and gets dressed in the morning | |
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| That’s it, I’m calling the cops! | |
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