All comics by Nukinin

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by Nukinin
11-30-01
True Story here..
Whats wrong? You seem disappointed.
oh, you were great and all but..
BUT BUT.. YOU CAME..
yes, I just, expected you to... tease me a little.
Immediately followed by the *smack* sound
You look like a clown..
where do i find these dorks??

 

by Nukinin
11-30-01
More real life tales...
Thank you for calling EddyJuans Internet
yes, Ive had your internet thingy for two weeks, and i havent gotten a thing yet
Umm, oki did you install the cd we sent you? or set up a dialer on your computer?
oh no... I just called your sales people.... shouldnt it be on my computer now?
pardon me while i strangle myself with my mouse cord.
mouse? whats a mouse? I called about Internet

 

by Nukinin
11-30-01
Do I need to tell you this conversation actually happened?
You do realize it doesnt just appear on your computer.
Well, I got this cd from eddyjuans internet.
Did you put the disk into your CD-Rom and follow the instructions?
Cd-Rom? ohhh the drink holder thing?
Somebody kill me.. please!!!!!
I was wondering why the disk didnt work in my car stereo.

 

by Nukinin
11-30-01
After installation....
Oki, youre going to have to restart computer for the changes to take effect.
alright.. Ill call you right back . I'm on my cordless phone.
uhh oki.. we cant stay on the phone to reboot?
Ive never known how to turn my computer off.. so I flip the breaker.
I kid you not boys and girls.. this story is true.
flip the breaker?
Duh, and that causes my portable phone to die. Whats your extension so i get you again.

 

by Nukinin
11-30-01
Two hours later...
I give up, I've installed the software on the disk, and rebooted my computer. Double clicked the two computers attached to the phone icon. And Im still not getting anything.. I wanna cancel my service
Um ma'am, after you clicked the icon, did you start up a browser?
Browser?
I'll say this slowly so you can understand. Once you connect, you need to start up a program so you can "browse" the internet. For most people it looks like a big blue E on your desktop.
Oki.. this ones mostly true..
Hmm.. a big blue E on my desktop? I dont see it, I only have my mouse thingy and keyboard. Oh this is so much harder than AOL.
And in local news today, a call tech from EddyJuans Internet, jumped from the top floor of their 10 story building. Eyewitness's report him as screaming "Death to AOL users" Reporting for ch11 news...

 

by Nukinin
12-01-01
The wisdom of buddha..
The buddha teaches us, to live each day as if it were the last.
Stupid computer, why the hell won't my printer work. I'll just dial the tech's at EddyJuans Internet.
..as seen from EddyJuans Internet
And working here, every day FEELS like my last.
Ring Ring

 

by Nukinin
12-01-01
Why play a "death simulator",
But why mom? Why can't I play quake 3 on the computer?
Because, I dont want you to go to school and shoot your classmates. Now come along Alex.
...when you get to see the real stuff
Its justa game mom, why would I do that?
All that death and violence, you'd be exposed to? Everyone knows those games are what caused Columbine.
every day at 12, 5 and 9 pm?
Reporting live, for Ch11. More death in the news today as a car was struck today killing all the occupants inside. We'll have live footage showing non stop for the remainder of broadcast.
oh.. wait a second Alex, I've got to check this out.

 

by Nukinin
12-02-01
My friend knows the coffee bar that Bill hangs out at in Seattle..Someday,
Excellent! Let me just put a title to this comic and save it. This must be my funniest yet. WHAT!?!?!?!?
Im gonna go there and meet Bill Gates, and when I do..
FATAL ERROR: a fatal error was caused in stack VXD:011WE5624762TG11301S622:53AE4T126657 -Please reboot your computer.
I'm gonna have MY blue screen of death on.
Come here Bill..do you see what my shirt says? Thats right.. fatal error. I'm gonna fuck you up.. get back over here.
Shit, he must have found out I get an email everytime one of those happens.

 

by Nukinin
12-03-01
When I was a kid, I had an imaginary friend.
hey lets pretend we're secret agents...
Oki.. and we have to rescue the president from the evil droids.
As I grew up, I left my imaginary friend behind for real friends, and considered myself fairly well adjusted.
Wanna go grab a few drinks tonight? Maybe hit a club?
Good idea man.. I got the first round.
I guess some people bring their imaginary friends with them into the adult age.
Hey, lets pretend your my dad!
Oki.. and we have to save the world from the evil pagans. Lets see if we can get a few others to play too.

 

by Nukinin
12-03-01
I hate being a newbie..
sheit
doheth
I just gotta get some experience making my comics..
Hey moron.. next time you gotta make a comic that requires a blank character, how about checking all your options. Stupid Newb!!!
the story of the imaginary friends might have been funny if the bubble didnt make it look like the younger you was getting head by someone off screen
Guess I just gotta get my hazing... bring on the beatings.
Gonna turn you over to DragonXero now for your punishment.
Come here noobie.. I'm gonna break you in real good.Then Im gonna introduce you to spankling.

 

by Nukinin
12-03-01
I hate being a newbie..
sheit
doheth
I just gotta get some experience making my comics..
Hey moron.. next time you gotta make a comic that requires a blank character, how about checking all your options. Stupid Newb!!!
the story of the imaginary friends might have been funny if the bubble didnt make it look like the younger you was getting head by someone off screen
Guess I just gotta get my hazing... bring on the beatings.
Gonna turn you over to DragonXero now for your punishment.
Come here noobie.. I'm gonna break you in real good.Then Im gonna introduce you to spankling.

 

by Nukinin
12-04-01
Nukinin, evil marketing genius.
A few years ago, a big craze hit the market. All centered around four letters. WWJD
What would Jesus do? In the interest of political correctness, not to mention a share of the profits I introduce you to the newest craze. WWBD
Did you see the newest coolest thing? I've gotta What Would Buddha Do bracelet.
Me too, arent they cool? Now when those damn Jovy witnesses come knocking, I can flash my bracelet and laugh. AHAHHAHA Then slam the door on them like I always do.
Heyyy Jesus, seen my cool new WWBD key chain? I got you a bracelet just in case you wanted one.
WWBD?!?!? Thats awesome. Think you can push my diaper over a bit and hang it there? Now I can flash it when those damn Jovy witnesses come knocking.

 

by Nukinin
12-05-01
One day at the whitehouse...
So I says, "Well, them cuban cigars ain't gonna get in there by themselves!"
Ha Ha
What the fuck are you talking about?

 

by Nukinin
2-01-02
Nuki moves into WebSales
Thank you for calling WhackHack webhosting, how can I help you?
I'd like to sign up for your internet service.. but I'm not quite sure I've pressed the right button
Mute button is your friend!!!!
Thats because you didnt, Brainchild!! I never knew following the voice prompts were so difficult!!!
hello? hello?
Un-Mute
Yes sir, you want EddyJuans Internet, they were option 1. I'll transfer you, have a great day.
Wow, he sure was nice, what great customer service.

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