All comics by OnyxBlackWolf

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by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
WELCOME!!!!
HELLO THIS IS ULTRA HAPPY FUN TIME COMICS ISSUE NUMBER ONE SUPER VALUE EXTRA!
I AM NOT A CHARACTER!
And thusly begins the ranting of madness. Don't worry. It'll all make sense soon.
MY NAME IS ANTONY. I AM THE MAIN CHARCTER. I HAVE A BOW AND ARROW AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY.
my life is a sham.
And by soon, I mean never.
HAHA You arn't allowed to use me cause Torin is using me as his main character! HAHAHAHAHA!
FUCK YOU RED HEADED MONGREL! YOU DESERVE NOTHING MORE THEN A STAB IN THE EYE

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
Hello sir! May you spare a coin for my mother? She is very sick with the plauge!
Get out of my way snotling! You smell like unwashed children!
ONE YEAR LATER!!!EXCALMATION POINT!!!!
Mother may have died but it is not for naught. I have created a formula that cures the plauge
THAT IS AMAZING! HAVE A ELEVENTYMILLIONBAJILLION DOLLARS!
A VALUABLE LESSON LEARNED!!!
Help me! I am that same rich man from one year ago but now I am poor! Can you spare a copper?
Much like that red headed jerkwad from the first comic, YOU DESERVE NOTHIING MORE THAN A STAB IN THE EYE! But we must help our fellow man. So here is a copper.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
OH NO ANTONY WATCH OUT FOR THE ZOMBIE!
Well, I guess it's time to get some more characters. And for things to make some more sense eh?
brainssssssssssssssssss
A SUDDEN EXPLOSION!
WOAH!
I am not supposed to have dialouge
Hey! Antony is the angry one! You are not allowed to swear sidekick girl!
You must be the new character! LINDSEY!
This is the lamest intro for anything in the world ever. EVER. I better not be the goddamed sidekick

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
Okay, screw this nonsensical bullshiet. Let's just introude some characters.
Yeah let's get on with it!
Firstly. I'm changing, taking off my hood and arrows and making myself look like this. I don't care if Torin is using it. He's mine now. Or rather he's me now. Or uh WHAT OHMYGODI'MHAVINGANANUERISM
NOW THAT IS MORE LIKE ANTONY! Hi I'm Kyle, I'm rich, and excentric! Woooo!
MAYBE YOU WOULD PREFER JENNIFER FOR A NAME LINDSEY!?!?!? EH!?!?!?!??! THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT! THERE'S NO MORE PANNELS SO YOU CAN'T ANSWER ME! AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA
I AM RED ROBOT. I AM REQUIRED TO BE IN EVERY COMIC AT LEAST ONCE. UNFORTUNATLY FOR THESE FLESH MAMALS I AM HERE TO STAY.
I have the most unoriginal name ever. Lindsey. Jesus christ.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
HEY! YOU! ANTONY! I'm calling you out!!!
Oh no! It's Torin!
THE BATTLE IS LARGE AND ILLUSTRATED!
STOP THE WAR BETWEEN TORIN AND ANTONY! JUST SAY NO TO WAR AND LITE MAYO!
THIS IS TORIN AND ANTONY FIGHTING! SEE THERE'S A FOOT!
IS THAT THE REAL ANTONY?! DID TORIN KILL HIM WITH THE TOUTED "STAB TO THE EYE" ?!! TUNE IN NEXT TIME! SAME BAT TIME! SAME BAT CHANNEL!!
Oh thank god you're.....WAIT! How do I know you're Antony?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
We're ignoring the last comic. So if you tuned in to see if it was Antony....it was. Torin went back to him comic.
You know what the best part of having your own comic is?
Not really....I'm just the sidekick
Watch I'll change your dialogue and thoughts
Man Antony is really hot. I wish I could get with him.
*lidnsey talks first by the way*
I love this job.
OH MY GOD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME! GET OUT OF MY HEAD! GET OUT OF MY HEAAAAAAD!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
Meanwhile in an underground bunker.
WE ARE ASZIANS.
YES. WE HAVE MUCH AZN PRIDE. WE WILL R0X0R TEH B0XZ0R
WE HAVE TEH SUPER P0WERZ.
INDEED. WATCH AZ WE RUNZ0R. N0TICE THE M0TI0N BLUR THAT SIGNIFIES 0UR M0VEMENT.
TO BE CONTINUED...OOOOOH SPOOKY WHAT WILL HAPPEN?!?!?!?
WE ARE ALSO BAD GUYZ. BUT N0T BECUZ WE ARE AZIAN. ALZO, M33T OUR BUTLER CARLOS.
HOLA. Mi nombre es Carlos y encuentro este todo muy ilógico.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
So what do yah think?
Wait...those asian girls are the bad guys?! HAHAHAH DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH!! ....Hey....is it getting warm or is it just me....
Oh shut up, what would you know?
OH MY GOD MY FLESH!!
Jesus can't you keep it down it's not that hot in...HOLY FUCK!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
8-29-03
H3LO.
W3 AR3 TH3 3VIL.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!? YOU FUCKING KILLED LINDSEY YOU LITTLE ASIAN FU-
QUITE RED HAIRED HUMAN BOY. WE WILL KILL YOU AND ALL OF YOUR KIND
TO BE CONTINUED AGAIN!!! WOOO OOOH OOOHH!!!!!!
NOW PREPARE TO DIE.
WE HAVE LOST OUR L33T SPEAK BECAUSE THE WRITER IS TEH LAZY.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
THE CONTINUATION OF THE PREVIOUS CONTINUATION!
W3 D0 N0T HAVE TEH TIMEZ0R TO DEAL WITH J00. CARL0S WILL MAKE J00 INTO A BAG-0-M3AT N0W.
¿Qué se está encendiendo? Soy un amante, no un combatiente. Debemos hacer los emparedados y no guerra.
You have got to be fucking kidding me. You know I can speak spanish right? He just said he's not going to fight me.
Si. Usted las pequeñas muchachas asiáticas es tales perras.
AZN KIDDZ G3TTING R3ADY!!!?!?! 0H N0. THEY WILL R0X0R P00R ANT0NY'S BOX0R!!!!
0H FUX0R.
WE MUST KILL THEM B0TH NOW....Z0R.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Fine, you little asian girls want a fight? I'll give you a godamed fight!
AHAHAHAHAHAHA J00 W!ILL PAY F0R YOUR TRANSGRESSIONS.
ALRIGHT! PERFORM SUPER HYPER ACTION BATTLE MACH ONE ARROW GOD OF THE NIGHT CHANGE!!!!!!
HAHAHAH YOU GIRLS ARE TOTALLY FUCKED NOW!
OONGAWA ANGEN-SAN!
tis is teh sux0r.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
The battle should start soon.
You little girls do realize that I'm going to fill you with so any arrows that you'll.......be....uh........filled with arrows. (shit that didn't come out right)
W3 D0 N0T F3AR J00. W3 HAV3 TEH SUPAR POWERS.
Hopefully...
You little asian fools! You will suffer by my hand and that is hand that causes suffering! And lots of it! You will feal the pain of a thousand arrows ripping through your flesh!
BUT W1TH 0UR SUPAR P0WERZ J00 WILL BE HELPLESS AND DEAD. VERY VERY DEAD. LIKE ROADKILL DEAD. I MEAN, THAT'S REALLY DEAD. LIKE LINDSEY DEAD. PILE OF ASHES. BOOM. THAT'LL BE J00.
zzzzzzzzzzZZZZzzzzzz
I think that it will be you who will find that you are the dead one and not I. You will pay for Lindsey's death by fire by ingesting many an arrow from my bow of love and justice! See the bow? SEE IT?
J00 AR3 TEH STUPID. HOW V3RY F00LISH J00 ARE F0R TINKING DAT J00 CAN TAK3 US 0NZOR. J00 WILL DIE IN A SMOLDERING, CORPSE LIKE FASHION. MUCH LIKE LINDSEY DIED. SCREAMING, AND IN PAIN.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
zZZZZZZZzz *snort* Huh? What? Oh god are they still talking? Jesus Christ.
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLA DEATH BY ARROW INGESTION!
BLAHBLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH AZN PRIDE!
That's it. One of you will suffer the wrath of the eraser, one of you that isn't the main character.
0H MY SHIT!!
SUFFER FOOL!
So....uh....can I pick the "fight the main character option?
I like that option much better than, you know, death by eraser.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
The Narrator actually has an avatar now! Joy!
Did anyone else notice that the only redeaming quality about that last comic was the line "Oh my Shit!" ?
Yeah....we can do better.
Meanwhile in the sorta real world but not really....
Jesus Antony...err...Onyx. You are such a goddamed tool. I thought we were gonna get an epic space battle that would rival a fight like the "Vash vs. Knives" fight in Trigun!
Hey Torin. I have an express message to you from me. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
Boy the sotry just seemed to jump ship eh?
Hey we should kick his ass for saying things like that.
I concur Aiden. Let's beat his ass like he's in prison....uhh..not like sexually, but metaphorically.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Hey Onyx, you fucked up in your last comic. You mispelled story. HAHHAHAH YOU SUCK!
Okay that's it fuck head. Time to turn on my powers of awesome *CONCENTRATE ACTION!*
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SOME ONE'S TURNING ALL MY MOLECULES INTO OTHER MOLECULES. MOLECULES THAT BELONG TO FIRE!
You gonna fucking insult me now you flaming prick!? EH!?! YOU WANT A SHOT OF MORE VAUGLY MAGICAL POWERS?! I'LL FUCK YOU AND YOUR GAY FRIEND UP MAN!
Mispelling words leads to violence kids.
WOAH WOAH WOAH! Hold on there! I am so not gay!
Oh thanks for clearing that up. I thought you were gonna, I dunno KILL HIM AND PUT OUT THE FIRES ALL OVER MY GODDAMED BODY

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Um....Antony sir? Would you put out Torin? Please?
Fine, whatever. Just leave me alone so I can get back to the goddamed story.
YES! Free from the painful fire of pain and fire! Oh by the way Antony, you misspelled misspelling and vaugely. JERK.
Oh that's it. BURN YOU FUCKING FUCKER!
You are such a goddamed retard Torin. I swear to god you are.
OH SWEET JESUS ON A JUNGLE GYM MAKE THE PAIN END!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Woah we're back on! Everyone get in postions! GET THAT GOAT OFF THE SET! Shit could you give us a goddamed warning next time? Ass.
BAHhHhHhHh!
Dammit! That's my personal goat! Noone touch it! MR. WEINER COME BACK!
Antony! Get off your dead ass and get into the frame! What the hell are you doing out of costume?!
Jesus Christ! Can't a guy get laid in the privacy of his own online comic strip?! Go on baby, get outta here.
Oh shit! Where's my bra!?
RED ROBOT! KYLE! YOU'RE NOT EVEN IN THIS GODDAMED SCENE WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!?!?
Please sir, we're so hungry, we havn't had a gig in days!
PLEASE ALLOW US TO CONSUME MAN FLESH AND SEVERAL BOXES OF COMPLIMENTARY DOUGHNUTS.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
IT IS TIME THAT WE FIGHT SMALL ASIAN SUPER VILLAIN!
IND33D ANT0NY! J00 N0W FAC3 THE POW3R OF SUZZY CHAN!
THE FIGHT ACTUALLY HAPPENS! HOLY SHITAGENGBURGER!
TAKE THAT FOUL DEAMON!
CURZE J00 ANT0NY!
EVEN MORE FIGHTNG!!! CAN I STRETCH THIS OUT LONGER THAN A DBZ EPISODE DOES?! TUNE IN NEXT TIME AND FIND OUT!!!!!
FINALLY A UPPER HAND!!!!! TAKE ARROW TO THE EYE!
3AT LAZ0R B3AMS J00 F00L!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Evenly matched?!
*huff huff* It seems that we are evenly matched.
Y3S. J00 AR3 A F0RMIDIBLE APONENT.
only one thing to do!
ALRIGHT TIME TO GET SERIOUS!!! SUPER TRANSFORM ALPHA OMEGA ULTRA PIT STAIN BLOOD SCYTHE!
WAT TEH FUCK? I ARE FUCKZ0RD NOW ARN'T I?
to answer your question Suzzy. You're fucked out the yingyang.
AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!THAT'S NOT FIRE I'M JUST POWERING UP!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
shit.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Alright! Finally we can end this stupid gag/first chapter!
BOOYAH BITCH!
WAT TEH FUCK? ALL J00 DID WAS PUT ON A MASK AND TAKE OFF J00R RANGER SHTUFF!?
I really don't want to write anything else. So let's just say that the battle happened and leave it at that.
N0T TEH FAC3!! N0T TEH FAC3!!
Ahhh, the brutal murder of two tiny asian girls. Nothing is more satisifying I mean...uh...OH MY GOD WHAT'S OVER THERE!!!!
Awww man! I'm all covered in asian girl!
oooooh this is the ghost of Lindsey OOOOOHHO OHOHOOOH!!!! Hurry up and resurrect me you prick.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
This is a real conversation I had with Aiden online*
*typing* Hey Antony! YOU ARE SO FUNNY OH MY GOD I JUST CREAMED MY JEANS.
Who the fuck is this? Stop IMing me you queer ass bitches, I don't need your praise! (side note: yes I do.)
*typing* I AM BEST FRIENDS WITH TORIN. YOU SHOULD PUT ME IN YOUR COMIC. ALSO TORIN USED THE BLONDE GUY AS YOUR MODEL IN HIS COMIC.
I did put you in my comic already, and WHAT?!
* except that it's not.
*typing* Antony! I think you're really cool and super awesome and other words that give praise and BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
*close window*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
This is also a real conversation I had*
*doodle doo* What? Antony's IMing me? He's not actually going to kill me now is he?
*typing* HEY STUPID FUCK ARE YOU THERE? I HAVE SOMETHING TO ASK YOU.
*typing* Yeah I'm here. What do you want?
What's this shit I heard about you using the blond guy as me in your comic eh?! NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT ME TO BE BLOND AND HAVE BUTT SEX WITH YOU IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
* you know what the star means.
*closes window and cries*
I really fucking love this job.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
The escapades of Torin/Antony/Aiden continue!
Hey Antony! I have some disturbing news about Torin's comic.
JESUS FUCK CHRIST WHY WON'T YOU PEOPLE LEAVE ME ALONE!?
...
*cough* Okay what is it?
You look just like Torin and Lindsey looks just like his girlfriend!
Oh is that all. Watch me now. Watch me. I DON'T GIVE A FUCK.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Ok Torin what's this shit I've been hearing about you/me and Ashley/Lindsey?!
Uh.....nothin? (i'm gonna fucking kill Aiden)
MEANWHILE INSIDE TORIN'S COMIC
I IS ANTONY IN TORIN'S COMIC. LOOK AT HOW ST00PID I IS! HELLOW LINDSEY!
I ARE ASHLEY AND NOT A BLATANT RIP OFF OF LINDSEY FROM ONYXBLACKWOLF'S COMIC.
*side note: Torin's comic is nothing like that and is quite funny. you should read it*
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!? I LOOK NOTHING LIKE THAT! AND THERE'S TONS OF FEMALE BODY TYPES WHY DON'T YOU USE ONE THAT I'M NOT ALREADY USING EH PRICK?!
*cries* I HATE YOU! YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
THE INSANITY CONTINUES IN A FASHION OF CONTINUATION!
HEY ANTONY! YEAH! I'M TALKING TO YOU FUCKTARD! YOU MISSPELLED MY GIRLFRIEND'S NAME YOU ILLITERATE BITCH!
Woah! Fucktard! I'm gonna use that in my next strip. Also I'm going to change your avatar. BITCH.
You better not you ass-OH SHIT IT BURNS LIKE THE FIRE OF PREVIOUS COMICS!
*insert maniacle laughter here*
Antony. You. Are. A. PRICK.
Why thank you Granny. Would you like a kick in the face now?

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
SHIT! EVERYONE BACK IN POSTION!
HOLY FUCK WE'RE BACK ON AGAIN!?
.......
What's the new story anyway?
MY PROBLEM HAS NOT BEEN RESOLVED GODDAMIT!
yeah, and I've only appeared twice! Are you ever gonna use me?
Oh man we're all fucked arn't we?
NOTE TO EVERYONE! SHUT THE FUCK UP! Jesus, we have to many characters with to many issues you know what these means!!!!
¡Una búsqueda épica que dará lugar a la muerte de muchos miembros del molde!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
Okay so let me get this straight. This comic is going to be about a quest to solve everyone's problems and it involves:
Me, Antony, OnyxBlackWolf. I'm the leader. I'm on the quest to keep my readers entertained.
Torin here, Antony's a dick and won't make me look like a guy so I'm on a quest to return my manhood.
Kyle here, I'm on a quest to get more "face time." Comeon look how cute I am!
This is Lindsey. I want a body back, preferably a hot one.
And thus was formed the "Fellowship of Teh St00pid." Oh man this is the lamest fucking idea ever.
Soy Carlos, y estoy en una búsqueda a no ser así que el dios damed el taladro y la confusión! Usted puede ser que también me llame una camisa roja. *gritos*
YOU THINK YOURSELF TO BE A "RED SHIRT??!?" I AM ALREADY RED ALL OVER! I WILL SURELY DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH. I AM ON A QUEST TO GET MORE MAN FLESH FOR THE CONSUMPTION OF ME BY THE WAY.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
THE QUEST BEGINS!
Hurry up Grandma Torin! You're in the front to pave the way QUICKLY. I SAID QUICKLY GODDAMIT!
I thought I was in the front so that if any monsters attack us, they kill me while you run away.
In the middle of the group
Man this is gonna suck, I hafta move you EVERYWHERE.
That's cause I'm a goddamed pile of ash you fuckwit! Now pick me back up and lets keep moving! You're spilling my goddamed legs all over the place!
Thankfully we reach the end of the group...
Que habla en español va a conseguir rápido VERDADERO aburrido verdadero.
YOU ARE TELLING ME. HURRY UP AND DIE BY MONSTER INGESTION ALREADY SO I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOUR BITCHING.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
¡COH MI MIERDA!
YES! VICTORY FOR THE ROBOTS OF RED!............OH SHIT THAT IS A HUGE FUCKING MONSTER!
I SHALL FEAST UPON THE FLESH OF HUMANS AND GRAY, HISPANIC ROBOTS!
BWAAHAHAHAHHA VICTORY IS ASSUREDLY MINE! GO SANTA CLAWS! KILL MY COMPANIONS SO THAT I MAY THEN KILL YOU AND FEAST UPON YOU ALL!!!
Jesus Christ I'm going to go kill myself. This comic dosn't make any goddamed sense. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! IS THAT SANTA!?!?! OHMYGODITHINKI'MHAVINGANANUERISM!
ARGHHHHH!
WHAT!?! WHO HAS DONE THAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-01-03
WHO DID THAT GODDAMIT!?!
Red Robot....poor Red Robot. Your lust for flesh was your curse, that Santa creature has infected you with many an arrow to the chest and head.
What are you talking about? I feel no arrows.
Yes I know...HEY WHAT'S THAT OVER THERE
Huh? OH GOD THE PAIN FROM YOUR ARROWS!!! GOD DAMN YOU ANTONY!
HAHAHAHHA SUFFER FOOL! THAT'LL TEACH YOU TO BETRAY US! THIS ONE IS FOR CARLOS! MAY HE REST IN ROBOT HELL!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-02-03
Antony... I have a question.
What the hell do you want Kyle?
Did you even READ your last comic? It totally sucked. I mean it's on the suckage level of a hoover vaccum cleaner or a Malaysian prostitue
Hey shut the fuck up I was really tired okay? And do you know how hard it is to write lines for Red Robot? He's all like "EAT FLESH blahblahblah." That is not good for diologue okay?!
And thus ends a faitful day of fait.
As evident by the shity writing fucktard. This LotCC is a shity idea anyway. AND ARE YOU EVEN READING THIS COMIC AS YOU TYPE IT?! IT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE TO FUNNY!
HEY KYLE! FUCK YOU! Everyone does shitty work at some point now leave me the fuck alone! Besides, I liked the Malaysian prostitue line....

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-02-03
Back in the actual story....
Antony, I have a question (woah deja-vu.) WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO RR AND CARLOS?!?!?!
I had to kill RR because he killed Carlos the happy, but irritating hispanic butler.
NOOO! I LIKED CARLOS IN A MAN FRIENDLY NON-SEXUAL WAY!!!!!!!!
Oh well, I'm sure he's resting peacfully in bowles of robot hell right now
Meanwhile In the Bowels of Robot Hell right now....
Odio de mierda yo usted
SILENCE FOOL I WILL CRUSH YOU THE MINUTE AFTER MY DAILY SESSION OF ASS REAMING!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-02-03
Alright Antony, so far my mission has been a huge success but now we had best resolve Torin's and Lindsey's. Luckily in an unillistrated comic strip I was told how to solve those problems.
Convenient that.
Indeed.
Yeah okay.
So how's it going?
JUST TELL ME ABOUT THE QUEST YOU GODDAMED FREAK OF NATURE!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-02-03
HURRY UP GRANNY AND STOP SPILLING LINDSEY ALL OVER THE PLACE! SHE'S OUR ONLY FEMALE CHARACTER!
Man this blows, I can't believe we're going to "Mount Doooooooooom Ooooh oooh ohhh *thunder crash*." And jesus christ did they have to make the name that long?
Do I look like I know or give a flaming shit? It doesn't matter anyway we still have to go to "that place."
I know Kyle why don't you continue to preempt my bitter rantings like the pretentious prick we all know you are?
Oooooh is it that time of the month? Should we all give Antony some space so his vagina can vent properly?
You do know that tonight when you go to sleep I'm going to stab you until you're dead right?

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-02-03
Well we reached Mt Doom but it looks like we're fucked.
Yeah no shit, the next few pannels are just pictures of the demon hordes that are about to violently violate our bodies and or ashes.
Why is this pannel so goddamed big?
WeWiLlCrUsHaLlMaNlInGs
BRAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS (psst, what's my motivation again?)
This comic was so not funny.
NONE SHALL LIVE THROUGH THIS NIGHT! WE WILL FEAST ON YOUR MARROW!
I'M GABBBBEEEE!!!OOOOOOHHHH!!! THEY HAD NO MORE MONSTERS SO THEY'RE USING ME INSTEADDDDD OOOOOOH!!!!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-02-03
DON'T WORRY EVERYONE! IN A FUTILE BUT VALIANT MOVEMENT I WILL HOLD OFF THE HORDES OF DEMONS! NAY FRIENDS! DO NOT COME TO MY AIDE! SAVE YOUSELVES!!!!
BLARGEL LARGEL!
I SAID DON'T COME TO MY AIDE! I WILL TAKE ON ALL...hey YOU PRICKS WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING?!
BONE MARROW FOR THE FEASTING!
fuckers......Shit that huge monster army is still right behind me arn't they?
no?

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
Meanwhile with the fuckers who ran away.
Holy fuck there is alot of violence over there where Antony is...
Who the fuck cares? LOOK! We're almost to the top of the mountain and such!
Well fuck me and call me grandma!
Oh Kyle, poor poor Kyle.
...please don't fuck me and call me grandma.
WHY ARE YOU SAYING THAT I WASN'T THINKING ABOUT YOU AND A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWHICH! JESUS WHAT IS THIS A GODDAMED INQUISTION?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
I use to many obcenities
Alright guys we're at the top! Now to commence with the solving of the proble-HOLY FUCK SHIT!
I AM SAURON! (Jesus christ there are NO models of guys in armor AT ALL. So now I hafta look like the goddamed grim reaper? this blows!)
So...uhh...what kind of lame thing do we have to do to get by you? Swear alot? Shit into Lindsey's ashes? Punch Torin until he's dead?
ALL GOOD SUGGESTIONS BUT NO! YOU MUST RETRIEVE FOR ME A RING. NAY, THE ONE RING. THE ONE RING....
If it's confusing, Kyle's asking a question but Sauron cuts him off...duh you stupid meat wagon. now go outside or something. NERD.
To rule them a-?
ONLY I MAY SAY THAT! AHEM. THE ONE RING, TO RULE THEM ALL!!!!!!! * DUN DUN DUN DUN DUNN DUNNN DUNNNNN...DUN DUN DUN DUUUNNN DUNNNN DUNNNN DUNN DUNN DUNNN DUNNN!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
Jesus Chirst Antony. Have you noticed that when you're spent for ideas you just post some piece of shit or go shoot the story over to us?
Yeah man, it makes no fucking sense. this LotR gag is old hat anyway
FUCK YOU GUYS! This shit is hard to write okay? I know I'm just dicking around right now cause I shot the story into the toilet.
Totally. Those little azn l33t speakers were like 4000 times more awesome than this flaming piece of shit. AND WHY HAVN'T YOU CHANGED MY AVATAR BACK YOU PR-
Shut up Torin. No one likes you. Go home before I crack you in the face with that gigantic power generator sitting behind us for no reason.
Well this degenerated fairly quickly. Jesus, the things I'll do for a laugh...

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
HELLO. I IS A CRAZY PERSON! HELLO ANTONY! I IS IMING YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU CHANGED YOUR SN TO GET RID OF ME AND ALL THE OTHER CRAZY PPL THAT JOO DO NOT KNOW IN RL! LOL!!1!!1!!ROFL!!11!31$!!
HOLY FUCK MY SHIT! WHERE IN THE HELL DID YOU GET MY SCREEN NAME YOU CRAZY BIZOTCH!?
I GOTS IT FROM KYLE'S SN! HE IS SO CUTE! I WAN'T TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM!
...(MUST KILL KYLE) Hey do you have his new SN? NO!? HERE IT'S THIS RIGHT HERE! *types it*
OMG THANKIES TO YOU! I LOVE HIM SO MUC-
*close window*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
HEY ANTONY! YEAH YOU FUCK HEAD! WHAT'S THE IDEA WITH GIVING THE CRAZY BITCH MY SN?! EH?!??!
YOU GAVE HER MINE BITCH FUCKER!
SO? AND GUESS WHAT! I TOLD HER THAT YOU LIKE HER AND LIKE TALKING TO PEOPLE THAT YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW! HAHAHAAH BURN FUCKER BURNNNNNNN! *signs off*
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!
Hi Antony.....*blushes*
Oh shit my fuck.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
Kyle told me that you like me. Even though you don't really know me and logicaly you'd have to be a loser to like someone over the internet.
I don't like you.
I just have to tell you that I'm getting married when I'm 20 so I can't date you. I'm sorry.
I DON'T LIKE YOU.
It's okay, you don't have to lie. I hope we can be internet friends.
*cries* why won't she go away?

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
KYLE IS SO CUTE OMG! BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
OH MY GOD SHUT UP AND GO AWAY.
But Antony I think you're super keen to talk to! And besided Kyle says you have terrets and don't mean half of what you say! lol! ROFL! GJ!!!1!$2516(&^%)!
ARRRGH FUCK YOU! AND FUCK KYLE! IN FACT...FUCK YOU AGAIN! GO AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK! I HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE YOU CRAZY BITCH!
........... OH ANTONY YOU ARE SO CUTE! BUT NOT AS CUTE AS KYLE IS WHICH A SURMIZE FROM SEEING ONE PICTURE OF HIM!
some one. kill me. please kill me.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
Has she gone away yet?
I hate you. May all your children be born with cloven hooves.
I'll take that as a no.
You know what I should do for revenge? Put your new SN
Go ahead fucker. I DARE YOU!
Alright. HEY EVERYONE WHO READS THIS COMIC! THIS IS A REAL SN: Kyle Seyz That's his SN, I'm not kidding. Go ahead and IM him into oblivion everyone. Comeon, you know you want to!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
Hi everyone! My friend Hayley said I should do a comic about her head getting stuck in a fan! So that's a what I'ma gonna do.
Man Antony you are totally PW by a girl you arn't even dating.
Hey Kyle. SHUT UP YOU GODDAMED FUCKTARD. YOU WILL PAY IF YOU CONTINUE THIS.
Yeah?! What are you gonna do? Post my SN again? THAT DID NOTHING HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!
YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS KYLE HOVENKOTTER. PAY WITH BLOOD. AND LOTS OF IT. BLOOD I MEAN. LOOK AT ME, I'M DARK AND SCARY NOW. THAT ONLY MEANS PAINFUL DEATH FOR ONES SUCH AS YOU.
Just don't stab my beautiful beautiful face. It's the only way I can get the ladies.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-03-03
Hayley is quietly dancing in her room
I'm a DANCIN DANCIN...
...DANCIN MACHINEEEEE!!!!!!
SUDDENLY disaster strikes!
WEEEEEE OWWWWWWWWW!!! OH GOD !!!!
MY HAIR! MY PRECIOUS PRECIOUS HAIR! DAMN YOU FAN! I HATE YOU FOREVER!
BUT NOT TO WORRY!
Stupid fan, making me bend down to free my hair from it's villanous evil clutches of evil and villany. Grrrrr I will make you pay for this fan!
FREEDOM! BWAHAHAHH AHAHAHAHAHA. NOTHING DEFEATES THE HAYLEY!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
Note: This comic isn't funny. I'm serious.
Antony, it's time we had a talk.
Yes. This is an intervention.
Your comic sucks balls Antony.
Yes, listen to the narrator. All the comics are the same.
You make a crappy one, then you make one that involves lots of swearing that mocks your last comic.
And you keep having jokes end with someone A: dying, B: bitching, or C: being told to shut up in someway
The lines "fucktard" and "close window" are overused here. Your comic went downhill, after the little Chan girls. Just make me a man again so we can start a new chapter. A funny chapter. DO IT. NOW.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
Do you really want to see the rest of it? I think not, let's just say what happened to all the characters much like Fallout did. mmmm Fallout.
I died. Horribly and violently. But then I came back like Gandalf did and kicked major ass inevitibly saving the day yet again! I ARE THE AWESOME!
I got my body back and let me tell you it was great. Although I did some questionable things when I first got it back...
i. got. laid.
I'm Hayley! I showed up in an episode that had nothing to do with anything and I just stuck around. So hi! My breasts are pointy!
Torin here! I got my body back! I am sooooo glad I have a penis back. Now if you'll excuse me I have a date with a tube sock in the bathroom.
I'm filling up space because I wasn't involved in the quest and all the other characters died. I guess now it's time to go back to my loveless and hollow life. *cries*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
We join Antony and Lindsey, already in a heated argument. Sorta.....okay Antony's just yelling again.
YOU DID WHAT WITH KYLE?!!?!?!?!!??
it was just once! I why do you care anyway? You had sex with Hayley! ACTION FLASHBACK POWER: episode "OH MY GOD THE STORY IS BACK!"
FB Dialogue comence NOW: "Antony! Get off your dead ass and get into the frame! What the hell are you doing out of costume?!"
"Jesus Christ! Can't a guy get laid in the privacy of his own online comic strip?! Go on baby, get outta here."
"Oh shit! Where's my bra!?"
Bu.........WHAT?! SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND! THAT IS IN NO WAY HAYLEY! THAT IS SOMONE COMPLEATLY DIFFERENT! I'LL PROVE IT! I'LL SHOW YOU! I'LL SHOW'EM ALL!!!!!!!!!
Sure you will homewrecker.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
Alright Lindsey here's your damnable proof.
Oh this will be good. What did you do slap a wig on a goat? HAHAHHAHA I AM SO FUNNY.
Hello.
Hello.
Revenvge is a dish best served cold and with a nice side order of fava beans. Ffffffffff fava beans.
...

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