All comics by Payne_To_The_Max

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-12-02
Yoyoyo, I'm Jesse! UNGH!
Cha-CHING!
Do a little dance bitch.
Shut the fuck up.
Okay.
Fuck you.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-12-02
Hi there.
Yoyoyo, I 0wnZ j00!
You r0x0rZ!
Shut the hell up, I am a WIGGER!
A good example of a wigger.
Hmmmm...I eat wiggers...
I eat your MOM out! OOOOO! Look at me, I'm so damned cool!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-12-02
Uh-oh! Looks like the Scientist is sucking up to the wigger!
Yoyoyo biz-natch, look at mah new jacket!
It-it-it fucking RULES!
OOOOOO! The wigger insulted the Scientist! What WILL happen next? Is the Scientist...OFFENDED?
Don't talk smack like that bitch! My jacket 0wnZ your jacket!
Ahhhhhh, you killed me with your MAJOR INSULT!
NOPE! Looks like the joke's on Wigger! Hahaha! Looks like wiggers don't prevail all the time after all!
That's because...I am WIGGER MASTERSON!
I'm still here bitch. And that was SARCASM! That insult didn't hurt me one bit!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-12-02
*GASP* No Wigger, no!
I'm going to RAPE YOU!
What's rape?
Dammit Stacy, you retard! Don't do it!
It's where I fuck you, when you don't wanna be fucked.
Cool! Go ahead, mate!
HAHAHAHA! WIGGER HAS A SMALL PENIS! But as for Stacy's comment: uhhh, I'll leave that to herself and her dog...
Shit, mine needs to be bigger...
Don't worry, I'm all worn out from my dog today...I think!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Heh, nice lookin' ho' you got there. But I'm going to take her away from you.
Uh-huh. How exactly are you going to do that.
Easy! KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS! I am SO much stronger than you! Let's fight! The winner keeps the ho'!
Sure you are, little fuck-face. Alright, on 3. let's fight. 1. 2. 3...
*NOTE TO WIGGERS* Never, EVER try to fight black pimps, or steal their ho'(s). Ever.
Holy shit, that was fast.
Hahaha, stupid ass. Now, I'ma go fuck mah black ho'. Peace out, yo'.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
YoyoYO! It be gettin' hot in here, so let's take off all our clothes. YO!
What the fuck...?
Hey, wazzup man?! I be your home-dawg G f00, from downtown Harlem, AIIIIIIIGHT?
Want your ass to be kicked again?
Well, that about explains it. Wiggers can try to talk black around OTHER wiggers. But if they talk black in front of black pimps? Uh-uh. Bad idea.
Uhhhhhhhhh. AHHHH!
That's what I thought bitch.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Hey there, mu' fucka'. Yo' mama's so dumb, she thought George W. Bush was DUMB!
What the fuck?
OOOOOOOO! GET OUT! ASSEZ VOUS! SIT DOWN! Burnsville. Population: 1 Dumbass PIMP! OOOOOOOOO!
This is getting really lame now.
In conclusion, wiggers have the WORST insults you can think of. And if you are ever offended by a wigger, then you need help. Professional help.
Yeah that's right! You run little dog! You run...
Fuck you too man.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
SWWWWEEEEEEET! A cigarette just for me! I'm going to smoke it!
...
The moral of this comic, is that wiggers try to smoke cigarettes, while trying to act all cool, yet they don't have a fucking clue on how to smoke it.
How the fuck do I smoke this thing?
Oh my fucking God...

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
WOW! Police say that the snipers who have been killing all these people, were spotted driving a white van on Friday, while they shot 2 people!
So?
So that means, that the snipers will be caught soon!
Not really. There are tons of white vans in the world. And they're probably just going to carjack another car, once they find out that a witness saw them driving in a white van.
Alllll right. Looks like I'll have to hunt them down myself.
You keep dreaming that Butch. Maybe you'll even be able to kill a sitting duck today. I mean, you almost had it yesterday!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
So, you say you forgot your license.
I'm afraid I did son. I am so sorry.
Don't give me that suck-up shit, Father. You know you shouldn't drive without a license.
Yes, I know Officer, but-
Thank God...
(Sniper) You're welcome!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Dum, de-dum, de-dum. What a beautiful day...
Shit, he spotted me!
What the hell?
AHHHHH! HE GOT ME!
AHHHHHH, THE SNIPER IS BACK!
It's called Flagswipe: Paintball, you idiot.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
So, Butch...I, uh, heard you killed the 2 snipers.
What's that? I couldn't hear you. Speak up!
*Sigh* YOU KILLED THE 2 SNIPERS!!!!
Correct! But...didn't you say that I wouldn't be able to kill the snipers?
Yes. I did say that. but what does it matter? You're a local hero now.
Yes, I certainly a-

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
What the hell is up with the Gamefaqs Moderators? They're all either fat, gay, or strict.
What do you mean?
Well, take wallywest80 as an example. He's FAT, GAY, and STRICT! And he has bad acne too!
Can I suck your dick?
...O...kay...
See what I mean?

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
George W. Bush wants to fight Iraq! How cool is that?!
It's stupid.
He believes that guns will solve the world's problems! Now we can all have guns, and kill each other! Like the snipers-
It's retarded.
-Which in conclusion, means he is the smartest man alive!
...Which in conclusion, means that you are as big an idiot as he is, for actully thinking that he is in the least bit smart.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
WOW! A tarot card was found near one of the sites of the sniper shootings! It said "Hello Policemen. I am god." THAT'S FREAKY SHIT!
...
...Don't you think it is?
Well...No, not at all.
And why not...? I mean, GOD wrote on that tarot card! GOD came down to Earth! GOD is sniping all these people!
Okay, God doesn't drive around in a white van. Plus, my 7 year old cousin could've wrote that.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Yup, I am the coolest kid in my school! I am also a Male model, sexy, and have sex with supermodels! FEMALES! (Hehe, idiot...)
No way d00d!11!! That's 5w337!(sweet)
Oh yeah? Well, I am black, buff, and I sleep with hoes! (Hehe, moron...)
Wow!11!!!11 That's fuck1n6 1337!
Never believe who anybody says they really are, on the internet.
I wish I could be like him...
I wish I could be like him...

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Damn them!
We must scare all the Earthlings, so they will believe in us aliens.
Yes. We must.
As the aliens come down to Earth...
NYAH! Scared you, didn't I?
No, not really.
To be continued...
WHAT?! WHY NOT?
Woof!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
...Continued from Part 1...
What the hell? That sounds like a..a..
Rrrrrmhhh...
AHHHHH! No, not the dog on a ball!
...A DOG! ON A BALL!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
RAHHHHH!
Uh-oh! Looks like Glorfon's friend has disappeared! TO BE CONTINUED...
Where the hell is my bloody back-up?!
Haw-haw!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Meanwhile, Zorfon is about to get biz-ay with a sexy lady!
Damn bitch, I wanna fuck you!
Well, let's start then! But are you using protec-
Uh-oh, spaghetti-o!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! A BLOODY WIGGER!!!!! ZORFON, HELP ME DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU?!?!?!?
Uh-oh...
Will Zorfon be able to save Glorfon in time? TO BE CONTINUED...
Um, I have to go.
Fucker...

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Uh-oh! Trouble is a-brewin'!
You son of a bitch! Go away!
Fuck you, bi-atch.
*gasp* It's...GREY ALIEN! Will he save yet another life?
What the hell?
Never fear! Grey Alien is here!
Yup! Grey Alien kicks ass, while jacking off at the same time! But...TO BE CONTINUED...
Eat lazer, asshole!
Just bring- AHHHHHHHH, I'M BURNING, I'm burningggggg...*glargh*

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Hey, thanks a lot Grey Alien.
Heyyyy, no problem-o! Now if you'll excuse me, I must go back to my home planet: Dickfuck. Well, bye!
Byyyyyyyyye! *sniff*
Who ya' talkin' to?
*gasp* Oh no! Glorfon just called Zorfon a fuck-face! And he told him that he doesn't need Zorfon around him! What will happen next? TO BE CONTINUED...
Go away Fuck-face! I don't need you around me!
BU-BU-BUT...!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
NO! GO AWAY! I DON'T NEED YOU AROUND ME ANYMORE! See that pile of ashes behind me?
Yes, I do.
Well, that pile of ashes was once a wigger-boy, WHO TRIED TO FIGHT ME! And most likely KILL ME! And guess who killed him? THE GREY ALIEN!
No way! Are they actully going to go their own separate ways? Find out, in PART 6! TO BE CONTINUED...
Awww, man! I was hoping you would die today! I mean, it is Earth after all! And you are a sissy, who can't defeat one Earthling here! Oops.
THAT'S IT! I NEVER want to talk to you again! It...it is time we go our own ways. TA-TA!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-13-02
Howdy. You may have noticed that in Part 6 of "When Aliens Attack!", the ending narration said that you'll find out what happens to the 2 aliens in PART 6!
What it REALLY should've said, is that you'll find out what happens to the 2 aliens in PART 7!
Tim Nicodemo(Payne To The Max) apoligizes for any inconvience he has caused. Thank you.

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-14-02
Glorfon became a mediocre stand-up comedian.
Why did the aliens cross the Milky Way? To get some milk for their cereal!
Get off the fucking stage!
Zorfon became a professional gigolo. But he wasn't always pleased with some of the customers he had.
Mmmmm...you have a nice body there. Today, we'll fuck each other ROUGH! Like 2 dogs! Arf Arf!
Sweet Jesus, what have I done?!
And Grey Alien? Well, he took lessons in Line Dancing. But from the start, he knew it was a mistake.
Take 2 steps to the left, and 1 step forward!
Steady...steady...NOW!

 

by Payne_To_The_Max
10-14-02
Glorfon became a mediocre stand-up comedian.
Why did the aliens cross the Milky Way? To get some milk for their cereal!
Get off the fucking stage!
Zorfon became a professional gigolo. But he wasn't always pleased with some of the customers he had.
Mmmmm...you have a nice body there. Today, we'll fuck each other ROUGH! Like 2 dogs! Arf Arf!
Sweet Jesus, what have I done?!
And Grey Alien? Well, he took lessons in Line Dancing. But from the start, he knew it was a mistake.
Take 2 steps to the left, and 1 step forward!
Steady...steady...NOW!

 

MALASHOOSTAH DABABAB!
Talk to me again, and I'll KILL YOU!
KALAMANDATWEET?! IO, IO!
THAT'S IT BITCH! YOU'RE GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL!
Maladoobab...KOUNDFLUFF!
Shit...

 

I like to eat...poo.
ROFL!
I am going to...poo.
ROFL!
ROFL!
*dancies*

 

Excuse moi...I must check out your buttocks.
What FURR?
Well...uh, you have a motion called...the "Ocean Motion".
Hey bitch lay off mah lady you got me good now gtfo and die.
Uh...sha-ZAAM!

 

Please, son, let me forgive you.
Nigga, please...
My beard needs a trimming. This is annoying me.
*sigh* Like I said before...nigga, please...
Bitch, I'ma smack you up.
Nigga--oh, shit...

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