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| Hello. Are you the President? | |
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| Yes! Well, no... But I used to be! Say, have you seen a pair of women's panties lying around--size extra large? | |
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| Uh, no. Have you seen a guy who looks just like me? | |
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| Not since my wife made me give up Southern Comfort and cheeseburgers after midnight. | |
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| I bet that weird guy I met in the restroom could have told me where the President was. I didn't like to bother him when he was barfing, though--- Hey! | |
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| Uhm, could you tell me where the press conference is being held? I'm a little bit dislosticated. | |
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