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| How DARE you not agree that my fingernail polish matches my hair elastic! | |
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| Ow... Hey, why am I stuck to the floor? | |
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| Hi, Jon. My tube of super glue sprung a leak, so I emptied it into your shampoo bottle. I hope you don't mind. | |
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| Damn! My woman caught me cheating with a whole stockyard of heifers, now I have to decide whether to dump her or apologize. Man, women are such a pain in the ass. | |
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| Wow. You sure have it tough. Now be a friend and douse my head in turpentine, won't you? | |
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