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| Mr. Shanquot, you have almost single-handedly facilitated the bringing about of world peace. Dispite your charitible donations, you are one of the richest men in the world. | |
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| You hold honorary doctorates from fifteen universities, the key to a dozen dozen cities, and tonight you will receive the congressional medal of honor. Tell us all: how do you so much? | |
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| There are so many people to thank... but one especially. I have to say I have to attribute my success to Ms. Haluszka, who in 5th grade made me memorize all the states and their capital cities. | |
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| I'm sorry. I just don't see that happening. | |
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| Okay, then how about this: learn the fucking capitals or I'll kill your parents. | |
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