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| We're really looking for a top-performer to fill this position. | |
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| Oh, that's me! I'm extremely well organized. I have a verifiable track record of success. I have three dozen certifications. I don't require food or sleep. | |
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| Our company's Core Values include modesty and humility. | |
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| I am scum. I'm completely incompetent. My breath is terrible. I haven't had a date in three years. | |
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| Today I stomped flat the last remnants of any pride I once had. | |
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| So? Did you get the Assistant Sychophant position or not? | |
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