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| I am the Ghost of Christmas Past! Tonight I will... | |
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| Stop right there, buddy. I'm Jewish. | |
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| Uh... then, er... I AM THE SPIRIT OF CHANNUKA PAST! | |
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| Sorry, but Channuka is one of our least significant holidays. The only reason anyone cares about it is that it comes around Christmas time. | |
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| Umm... I am the hallucination caused by drinking Everclear straight from the bottle! | |
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