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| Admit it! You know goatees look stupid! The only reason you have one is because you want to show off what little facial hair you can actually grow! | |
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| *sob* Yes! Yes, it's true! | |
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| Actually, a goatee adds a measure of sophistication to the face. A debonair, worldly look. | |
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| The look of a champion, nay, of a KING! | |
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