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| The trick to drinking an entire bottle of cheap whiskey in five minutes is to spill it liberally all over yourself. | |
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| Of course, when you wake up the next day in a pile if your own vomit and urine, you've got to remember not to light a fart or you could go up like a huge fireball. | |
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| Somehow, I don't think you're what they had in mind when Nike started selling shirts. | |
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| I keep the logo prominent by never washing this shirt. | |
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