Wait, why the hell does the Prince of fucking Persia fucking control time? Isn't that an arbitrarily thrown in and gratuitous gimmick plagiarized from previous video games?
Well...see, it's because the Pharaoh has a dagger of time and...well...it's a war between Space Persians and Cyber-Egyptians...
And why the hell are you fighting a Pharaoh? And when did this game franchise go from a guy running around in a dungeon stabbing people with a falschion to bizarre supernatural plots?
Well...it's like a DJ...you can freeze time. Isn't that cool?
And at that, why is the Prince of Persia delving into dungeons and slaughtering grunts and skeletons? Don't you think if he was a Prince of an entire nation he could get someone else to do it for him?
Alright! I admit it! It makes no sense! But the average video-game consumer is too stupid to figure it out! Which is why we'll have to eliminate you so you can't talk!
