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| There was once a guy called Alexander. He was a Zookeeper. He looked after monkeys. | |
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| One day, a monkey threw a large lump of shit at him. So, in great anger, he shot the monkey in the foot. | |
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| The monkey was not happy with this, so he threw another lump of shit at Alexander. | |
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| Alexander then quit his job and became a professional golfer. But the monkey escaped the zoo and shat all over Alexander. | |
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| So Alexander broke the monkeys neck and tossed it in a river. The shit left Alexander black, so he changed his name to Tiger Woods. | |
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| And that is why Tiger Woods is black. | |
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