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| Good evening and welcome to Channel 3 Eyewitness News. I'm Hugh Jerry Olas... | |
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| ...and I'm Betty Humpter. Kobe's penis. Weapon of ass destruction? More on that story later. | |
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| But first, Iraq. Sounds like IROC. Is this country trying to appeal to race fans with its name? With more on that story, here's Betty. | |
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| Actually, Hugh, breaking news out of California says that Governor Schwarzenegger was attacked with another egg. Arnold assures constituents that it's "not a tumor." | |
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