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| Dear Jordan, Could you put me in your? Kthnxbye | |
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| No. Right them back and be like "Hey, fuck you" | |
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| Dear Jordan, This is your third and last notice to pay your ransom for your family before we finally kill them. | |
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| Stupid fucking kidnappers. Be like "If you kill them, then how are you going to get money? Bet you didn't think of that you fucking gaytron prime." Yeah that's good | |
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| That's all your mail. Except for you playboy magazine and Game Informer | |
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| That reminds me, I gotta go uh...yeah gimme those you bald fuck! | |
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