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Will Smith and Tom Hanks, Saddam's whores
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| We don't feel it's appropriate to attend the Oscars when we're bombing folks. | |
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| Good job we weren't actually nominated. | |
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Nicole Kidman, spinster, and Russell Crowe, soon-to-be-ex-bachelor
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| Who'da thunk putting on a nasal disguise would fool people into thinking you're a good actor. What a world. | |
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| Quick, there's just time for some bumsex. Hey, I'm talking to you. | |
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| Even though he half-closes his eyes and whines in lieu of acting, I think Michael Caine should win for his role in that Vietnam film. | |
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| Ho! Don't mention the war! | |
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