Meet the candidates

Author: andydougan

Date: June 28, 2001

by andydougan
6-28-01
David Davis
I'm the "dark horse" candidate. Which is a polite way of saying no one's ever heard of me.
Michael Ancram
Our Party got an absolute doin' at the last two elections. Logic dictates, then, that if it stays exactly the same it'll win next time!
Michael Portillo
I mean, c'mon, you know, we should keep the bigotry and racism, but dress it up to make it seem nice. The public are so thick they'll vote for us!
I hate this job.