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| "Things I've learned as a parent", by attitudechicka. | |
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| Never hold a baby above your head. He will likely spit up on you. | |
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| The chances of this happening increases by 12% if your mouth is open. | |
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| Never ask someone who's never had kids to hold your baby. It's like watching someone try to grab a fish out of the water. | |
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| Babies can shoot pacifiers up to 30 feet. | |
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| Cat tails are a delicacy to babies. | |
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