Off The Beaten Trek

Author: biped

Date: January 14, 2007

by biped
1-14-07
ENSIGN JACKOFF! I thought I told you to get a haircut! You look like one of the freakin' MONKEES!
BUT, KEPTAIN-- my hairstyle is vell vithin da Starfleet regulations!
SPOCK! I want you to put one of them Vulcan neck pinches on Jackoff so's we can haul his mop-top ass down to the barbershop!
Captain, I checked the regulations, and you do not have the authority to order me to apply the Vulcan neck pinch for your own selfish whims.
COMPUTER!!! INITIATE SELF-DESTRUCT SEQUENCE!!! CODE ZERO...ZERO...
Oh, all right. Where is the goofy little bastard?