The Height of Evil 3

Author: biped

Date: January 29, 2009

by biped
1-29-09
Please help me, sonny! My kitty is trapped in a drainpipe, and I'm too big to crawl in there. I need someone really, really small--
(sigh) I'm Satan, DAMN IT! I do EVIL things, not nice thi--oh, fuck it. Where's the damn cat.
...and this month's "Size Isn't Everything" award goes to you. In our eyes--and those of Mrs. Hudson's kitty cat, Muffin--why, you're ten feet tall.
Lovely. How patronizing. And what's this--a pie? THIS is an award? A fucking PIE?
Mmm-boy, this sure is good pie.
Oh, SHUT UP!