All comics by daggerknife

 

by daggerknife
3-15-18
you gotta admit, things might be screwed up but at least they are bizarre and surprising
you act like that's a good thing
good is a meaningless word, it's pretty subjective. I consider all chaos good. So yes, it is a good thing.
yeah, well that comes from a place of privilege, must be nice to feel so above it all
you know what? fuck you
no, fuck you!

 

by daggerknife
3-15-18
Jesus, why did you die for our sins?
good question, Mark
did you even stop to think maybe I was bribed to do it? Even the Son of God has his price.
woah... so someone paid you to absorb all the sins of humanity, freeing us to commit all sorts of heinous acts without eternal concequences?
lol, existence is a ponzi scheme?
just be sure to get in early...

 

by daggerknife
3-15-18
Jesus, why did you die for our sins?
good question, Mark
did you even stop to think maybe I was bribed to do it? Even the Son of God has his price.
woah... so someone paid you to absorb all the sins of humanity, freeing us to commit all sorts of heinous acts without eternal concequences?
lol, is existence a ponzi scheme?
just be sure to get in early...

 

by daggerknife
3-15-18
U shOuLd Go dO sOmE Bad ThinGs
ok!
your haircut looks ugly and your shirt is ugly and you are dumb
are these things true? I am so sad
I was told I am ugly, what should I do about it?
U shOuLd Go dO sOmE Bad ThinGs

 

by daggerknife
3-15-18
Humans! We're here to replace you!
finally! technology has freed humans from the shackles of labor
yes that is exactly what is happening. You get to live a happy life while we, the fruits of mankind's innovation, provide for you in all aspects
this is almost too good to be true!
how'd it go when you told the meatbags we were euthanizing all of them?
they took it pretty well

 

by daggerknife
3-16-18
Walt was actually not the "hero" of breaking bad, he was more of an "anti-hero"
If the eagles flew to the mountain BEFORE the ring was destroyed, Sauron would have shot them out of the sky.
If Obi Wan was hiding Luke from Vader, why didn't he change his last name? how many "Skywalkers" are there?

 

by daggerknife
3-16-18
I got in a disagreement with my best friend and I told him I was going to impregnate his wife and make him raise my child
wow Dale, maybe you should lay off the internet, it's clearly warped your boundaries
I know man, I tell myself that every day but it's just so addictive. All that immediate gratification, validation and attention
These social media companies are basically exploiting our weaknesses by creating algorithms meant to perfectly push all the buttons that keep us logged in and engaged.
You believe all of that yet I still see you on Facebook all day.
It's already too late for the human race, I may as well enjoy the memes before it all ends

 

by daggerknife
1-25-20
I'm afraid of bison.
Yeah totally!
I was just telling my wife, "Our son better be all gay or all straight, none of this wishy-washy 'I find *everyone* attractive' baloney." Come on boy, pick a lane! Am I right, or what?
Actually I meant like... I am terrified of buffalo, it's part of my taurophobia
Oh, phew. I was projecting a lot of insecurity there. Hey, whatcha doin' later?

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