All comics by darakat5

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by darakat5
11-04-03
Robot Speach.
My fellow machines. I talk to you today about Terminator 3.
Now I know what your thinking. Cuase I thought it to. Are these humans finaly on to us? Well I have once and for all finally answerd that question.
Possibly.

 

by darakat5
11-04-03
How to answer a phone like a monkey.
Ring! RING! RING!
Do you think I should answer that?
Ring! RING! RING!
Oook.
Hello? Ook to you to, what are you a monkey?

 

by darakat5
11-04-03
How to speak to a monkey.
Yes. I am a monkey. My name is Keith. Hello.
Your a talking monkey, called keith. Yeah right.
Alright I was only kidding you. I am really just a guy named Keith.
You sure your not a monkey?
This is tedius
I kindof have primatephobia

 

by darakat5
11-04-03
Mokey makes converstion.
So. Who are you?
Me? I am Phill.
Phill. Hi. How are you?
I'm fine. Are you sure your not a monkey?
Yes for the last time I am not a monkey. Yup. I am a ape.
Really? Ok. I like apes.

 

by darakat5
11-05-03
Conversation gets a bit tired.
It's about now that somthing strange happens and we start to get a story line.
Yeah. I wish it would hurry up.
Any minute now...
Come on...
Phone spontaneously combusts.
Predictable really.

 

by darakat5
11-06-03
The apocolypse has been and gorn.
So you where wrong, the Humans wern't onto us.
I said possibly. I didn't say yes or no.
Yeah well your the polliticain.
Yup.
You havn't had any conversations with talking apes, have you?
... Okay... I think you need a refit.

 

by darakat5
11-06-03
Hmmm the my phone spontaeouly combusted. Oh well. Better go see what the weather is like outside.
*door opens*
Woh.

 

by darakat5
11-07-03
Looks like my house survived the balst. I wounder why my phone blue up?
Huh? Someone survived!
Hey my phone just blue up! Do you know why?
AH! A TALKING MONKEY!

 

by darakat5
11-08-03
Hey, I don't have to listen to this sort of discrimination.
... beep... ... does not compute...
I think someone ows someone an apology.
... beep beeep... ... does not compute...
come on. I can wait all day if I have to.
...restart and return to bootstrap....

 

by darakat5
11-08-03
Some time later...
So, you did talk to a monkey.
He, says he's an ape.
Whats the diffrence
... I know this is going to sound cheesy, but I think its a class thing...
Your right, that was ceesy.
Sorry.

 

by darakat5
11-09-03
So? Let me get this stright, you want the human restance to surrender?
Not really we could wipe you out in a few hours, we just want to know where you got the talking monkey from?
Talking monkey?
Yeah I will introduce you.
Keith is faced with a delimer...
Uh. Hi.
Oook.

 

by darakat5
11-09-03
The robots say you talk.
Damm robots, almost give me away.
I don't think you do. Your to stupid.
Damm. I have to answer that one...
Keith is forced to talk
Well? Are you stupid or are the robots stupid? What do you meen not technicly?
The robots are most definitaly stupid, its just I am not techicly allowed to talk...Well its a long story, it all started...

 

by darakat5
11-11-03
So thats how you can talk.
Pretty much.
So what happens now?
We get out of here.
You can get out of here?
I have known since the last time they put me in here.

 

by darakat5
11-12-03
Your in the middle of a desart with a monkey what do you do?
You know this desart wasn't hear last time...
It wasn't?
I am pretty certian the Robots are fing with the enviroment
So? Humans did.
Thats no excuse, what monkey did you see destory 5 continates, several billion life forms and overpopulate the planet?
Humans....

 

by darakat5
11-13-03
Well I knew where I was going when there where trees here...
Sure you did...
De ja vu...
Whe are going round in circles...
Well I knew where I was going when there where trees here...
Sure you did...

 

by darakat5
11-15-03
Oh shit I lost him...
Hmm what shall I do now? I am a monkry in the missle of noware with no people arround, amegedons been and gorn and now this!
I have run out of banna's! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

by darakat5
11-17-03
We ask the question are robots emtionless cybernetic killing machines?:
Are you sure they went this way?
*Beep*. Airfimative. *Beep*. #Barp#.
Your puprosefuly talikng like a robot, Max, please stop it.
*Beep*. Negative. Cannot Stop doing it till you apologise for last week.
Answer: Somtimes.
Oh come on! your a zx56 I'm a zx78 it will never work.
Robots have feelings too. *Beep.*

 

by darakat5
11-17-03
A voice comes from the distance.
YOOU WHOO!
Er... Hi.
Hello.
Keith has never been good with other talking monkies (or apes).
So... How about those mets?
...???...

 

by darakat5
11-21-03
Sorry about this...
Darakat wishes to apologise for the complete lack of comics.
He also wishes to say that as soon as http://www.plufim.com and http://abnormalcomics.keenspace.com/ are updated he will also make a new edition to his comic.
He also wishes to advise that the actul reason is that he doesn't have any ideas left at the moment and as soon as his brain start working again he will make a new story line comic. He hopes.

 

by darakat5
11-21-03
In the meentime some political coment from Australia (where I live)
So, Peter are the left fighting back or are we going to have another free election?
Your asking me that? Your the PM.
Hehe. But serriously do you think labour, the dems or possibly even the ree have any chance?
No of course not. Why are you asking?
Peter Costello gets his big brake.
Becuase I am going to retire.
Somehow I need some hands to rub together and go "execelent"

 

by darakat5
11-21-03
Meenwhile in Labour
M Lathem: So carmen lawrence got the presidency. Do you think the Left is going to split?
S Crean: Ha. I bet you they don't.
M Lathem: So if we loose who's going to get the leadership do you think.
S Crean: Hey! I could go another term.
The truth finally sinks into the "right" faction.
M Lathem: Yeah... Right.
S Crean: ...

 

by darakat5
11-23-03
S. Crean meet with some guy...
S.Crean: So your pat of my consituwency huh?
S. Guy: Actuly I voted for the greens.
S.Crean: Why the hell did you go waste your vote like that?
S. Guy: Well for a start I am a member of the greens...
S.Crean: You can still vote for me right?
S. Guy: No. I'm the guy whos opposing you in the next election.

 

by darakat5
11-26-03
S. Guy: ...And that why your not getting greens prefrences next election.
S. Crean: What happens if its a double disalusion?
S. Guy:... Shit...
Always realy on the greens not to think of everything.
So thats why your not getting democrats prefrences for the next election...
Some how this is getting repedative...

 

by darakat5
11-26-03
Crean fases leadership challege... We meet the two other candidtatyes for labours leadership
Hi. I am Mark Latham
Hi. I am Kevin Rudd
I am Labour Right and make as much sense as the new leader as putting Simon Crean back in the leadership. However I do have the amazing argumentative skils that could make almost anyone else do things
I also have the good looks that Labours been looking for.
Nobody knows anything at all about me or even knows what I look like. Infact no-body not even cartoonists have made a critical blow. Thus I have the durability that Labours been looking for.

 

by darakat5
11-28-03
And now the comic commences again. 10 seconds later.
I know you think that you left with me in some sort of love affair.
Well I have to say that the relationship lasted less than the authors world record of 1.3 seconds. It lasted .3 of a second.
This is why. mmmm bannana

 

by darakat5
12-02-03
Mark Lathum wins the Labour leadership...
Hi I am Mark Lathum I support the labour...
????
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Unfortently its slightly harder to have a press confrence where you don't refrence the librals as arselikcers...
this will be slightly harder then I thought
Sorry Mark, When your not swearing or calling the librals arselikers your just boring!

 

by darakat5
12-04-03
A statment from the Leftish Commie Libralist Green who writes this comic.
The author of this comic whould like to say a few small words about the university changes passed last night by 4 sentors who shall remain nameless.
F!^@%@& BL)))%^ RING WING !*@(#@(# WHO !&@*#^ BL((D& F**(@& DO THAT !*@&@!*!&@& WITH THE !@&@*@&@@@*@*(@&@(!@(@ SHOULD BE SHOT!
^!@&*#(^!*(#^!!!!!! The auther thanks you for allowing him to say that

 

by darakat5
12-05-03
Now you know.
Hello and welcome to darakats mind. As you can see darakats mind will be represented by the Duck.
G'day.
Question 1. taco bell is artificial barf?
What the hell is taco bell?
Ok. Moving right allong question 2. how do you calculate the derivative of a monastic monkey?
Pie.

 

by darakat5
12-10-03
Due to one thing and another, this comic is going from its orginal theam plot, to somthing eaier for darakat to write comics about.
He is now going to write his comics theamed on his life. However to do this he needs the most expressive and useful charicter in the stripcreator theam. Thus.
*POP*
Suprisingly Enougth it even looks like me, exept it doesn't have glasses and I don't wear blue that often, but hell I can't be botherd geting a site to host drawings I am not going to do, so you and
Me witll have to put up with this for the time being. Until either I can be botherd getting that free site or you start PMing me telling me my comic is popular enougth for its own site.

 

by darakat5
12-10-03
Yes again I am talking through the phone. Sorry. It had to be done. I am here to inform eveyone I am now looking for a new site for my comic after I have got sic and tired of bloody stripcreator.
...
Sorry. Those of you who wish to contact me, either log look at my hoime page (h2g2) or join IRC @ irc.rebelirc.net #starp-irc

 

by darakat5
12-10-03
http://fire.prohosting.com/darakat/
http://fire.prohosting.com/darakat/
http://fire.prohosting.com/darakat/
http://fire.prohosting.com/darakat/
http://fire.prohosting.com/darakat/
http://fire.prohosting.com/darakat/

 

by darakat5
12-18-03
Sorry. Its not working
I will find a new server
Please don't leve me. I will do a song and dance if you like.

 

by darakat5
12-18-05
So this is back now?
It seemss that way
What happen to the new server?
It cost money.
So we are back here were it is technlily free?
Yup.

 

by darakat5
12-18-05
So your a talking bird?
Yes.
...
Ok. Well I suppose that works.
... Jerk.

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