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| Mr. Darcy, your lack of interest in conversation or dancing makes you the rudest person I've ever met! I hate you! | |
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| I hate you too, Miss Bennet. No, wait, I changed my mind. I like you because, in your convoluted circumlocution, you occasionally express your actual opinion. | |
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| Terrible news, Miss Elizabeth/Eliza/Lizzy! Your sister Lydia has disappeared with a young man! I'm not worried that she's hurt but I am worried that they might be having premarital sex! | |
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| That's awful, Mr. Dad! Let's hope we can pay him enough money to marry her, since certainly nobody would do it for any other reason. | |
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| Good news, Mr. Dad! Mr. Darcy has solved Lydia's problems by throwing money at them, and now he's going to solve my problems by marrying me! | |
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| Well, that sounds right and proper all around. Does he have any brothers? Because I still have some unmarried daughters.... | |
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