All comics by gelatin

 

Meatloaf (the singer, mind you) shot the clothesline. by gelatin 2-04-01
As the day progresses.... If my lover, Speakerface the cowhand, could only hear me.... Judas priest, my lonesome gauge done hit bottoms.	A phone pines for the love it can never wrangle. I've lost the will to ring. I'm a itchin' ta do some ornery a doins', but I hate to step out alone into the wild prairie night.	The day has ceased to progress now. I wish I was a can tied to another can. I done buttered my shit sandwich, guess I better lick the cat's ass again. 'N call it a night.

 

That night you stayed in. by gelatin 2-04-01
FUCK. I...I'm sooo fuckin' hammered.....I bet some dick called the pigs cuz you were laughin' soo loud at that mailbox. Hizza youse thash lets thee ass run away.	Your retarded donkey is still tied to a tree out at the county line. I think. It better well, fuckin' be! I blessed that ass. I......ash...asss. Ha! Asssssss. hee.	" I see you fellas been doin' some partyin'. How about some I.D.?" Shut up dick....he's walking over here. who woulda thought?

 

You posed for rough riders. by gelatin 2-05-01
threeve years from now. dipshit. Your doom. YR doom.	However, though, today is here. I swear I hear you ticking. How can I do this like this? I'll wait here forever to see. I'm a real, a genuine person. Swear.	Not even threeve years yet. Your right. I am flipping out about this no big deal half way point of our love. Just keeping looking that way, retard. I'll eat our broken hearts.

 

The Secret League Of Making Mindy Well: Meeting one. by gelatin 2-05-01
Things are awry...... My computers have gone all a glitched. Mindy is ill.Her antibiotics do nothing for how I miss her so.	"Robot-to-Phone Transform" is go. Yet things awry still green light too. What's the point in ringing? I would do anything, yet nothing can occur to me.	This valley to your heart; only a flu betwixt the two. Cold germs stave off the many, yet dynamite am I. I'll be here long after she's better. Do your worst phallic rocket of wellness.

 

Are you there Cthulhu, It's me, Retar. by gelatin 2-05-01
Barely audible over the guttural moans of sinners..... So like I said, my soul for her not being sick. Can it ever be a deal? Your creepy persistance is loathsome. Therefore, I Lucifer, decline.	My plea bargain was all shouts in the quiet God kingdom. Jesus said this is the only way... Hold on, sorry, dad says "NO"! Good try though. Maybe you should try Cthulhu. Couldn't hurt any worse than this did. Idiot.	Deep in Appalachia, a moonshine still drones over my rejection..... Her condition will worsen. I must continue..... Cthulhu does not give even two shits about you. SILENCE!!!!!!

 

monkey has a poo by gelatin 2-14-01
sean's up to his monkey shines! poop let me see here......	oh sean. penis SWEET FUCKING JESUS........HAPPY HOPPING WHORE!!!!!! that fucking smarts.	what's this......SATAN!?!?!?!?!?! you fool..now i SATAN will show how it is done!! watch me you boob as i walk on my ball in my panties and awesome shirt!!!!!

 

THE FOOL by gelatin 2-19-01
curse...a curse on me. this feeling of loss, the taste of bile. dead is the heart that loves, i see this now as i am left alone on this cold winters day.	death hangs thick in the air. the time is here....my time. no one must ever know what i am about to do.	good bye

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