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| Anything interesting in the newspaper? | |
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| Apparently the world's squirrel population has obtained sentience. | |
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| Even weirder is that apparently their psychological makeup makes them perfect members of the Mormon church. | |
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| That might explain why I was bumrushed by a squirrel posse opening the front door. | |
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| Yeah. They haven't learned to use bicycles yet. | |
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