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| You wanted to see me Colonel? If this is about the dogging sessions on the firing range I can explain... | |
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| No, Bilko, it's about the unauthorised use of photographic equipment. | |
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| Sir, those kebab vendors and I were engaging in... | |
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| Shut it, Bilko! Despite everything you've done the country proud! Getting rid of Piers Morgan is better news than securing Basra was! | |
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| Having said that, you'll still face the firing squad. This is a time of war after all... | |
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| "Bilko joins the Queen's Lancashire Regiment" I've never seen this one before... | |
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