Celebrity Suicide Pun Hot Line

Author: kaufman

Date: January 15, 2002

by kaufman
1-15-02
Celebrity Suicide Pun Hot Line, what is your emergency?
It's the actress, Ms. Tomlin. She overdosed on tranquilizers. I fear she's now Lily of the Valium!
Celebrity Suicide Pun Hot Line, what is your emergency?
King Arthur just blew his brains out using an ancient Roman gun that fired 2.54 mm bullets. Ballistics confirm he used an X Caliber.
Celebrity Suicide Pun Hot Line, what is your emergency?
The great mathematician Pythagoras is dead! He jumped off a chair after putting his head through a hypote noose.