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| On the 17th of March / We used to get so drunk / We'd throw up in the parking lot / Stink worse than a skunk ... | |
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| St. Patrick's Day was just an / Excuse to have green beer / Sobriety could not be found / Within miles of here! | |
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| I had another Guinness / Then Right before my eyes / St. Pat appered in boxer shorts / Hearts girding his thighs | |
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| He told us this was not how / To celebrate his day / "Remember it commemorates / How I drove the snakes away!" | |
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| If you see one around here / Put your lips around its head / Then suck out all its venom / Till it falls limp and dead. | |
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| My goodness I see a snake / Emerging from my pants / Now come on boys and kill it / And I'll do a happy dance. | |
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