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| Step right up! All aboad for the Goat Boat! Only three pounds! | |
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| The Goat Boat? What on earth is that? | |
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| It's like the Tunnel of Love, but instead of getting to sit with a lady, you get brutally buggered by a randy male goat. In the dark. | |
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| And you expect people to actually pay for this? | |
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| We pipe in romantic music. And there's an animatronic weasel. | |
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| You got change for a fiver? | |
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