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| Chaos ensued today as the guests at the MTV awards overthrew the government. With me now is new Information Minister Pink. | |
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| That is correct, Horatio. We celebrities feel that if we are to be worshipped as gods then we must rule like them. | |
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| What difference will the new regime make to the lives of the average citizen? | |
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| Citizens will be required to pledge allegiance to us daily, from memory, on pain of death. The new pledge has been drafted by Sean Paul. | |
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| Okay kids, repeat after me: "Fi chill me cyaan see and cyaan. And pon de safe dem will put it. Dat ting a weh yuh got dey. Man dem a run alla dem chase an dem hype up." | |
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