All comics by mancreature42

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
you're not familiar with the bad driving stereotype associated with asian people?
not really. i know they drive cars with internal combustion engines that utilize rice as fuel.
NDN
Post # 146513

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
you should be a reality show producer. you're good at leading people into situations.
like parenthood.
ndn. post #144482

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
"HE WAS ON THE 52 YARD LINE ASSHOLE!"
There is no....
ndn. post #143669

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
Their site is garbage...in terms of New Releases.
do they even have indy movies? it failed the test a few months ago when i was looking for some indy movie.
temple of doom?
ndn.
post #139923

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
i'm never paper filing again. i just e-filed two weeks ago, and i already got paid via direct deposit. am i that far behind the times?
i twittered my taxes and got money back before i was done typing
ndn.
post #127432

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
Mp3s from youtube sound terrible and only about half of it is on youtube.
try bit torrents
Can you explain this but torrent?
i'm halfway through a large iced coffee. i'm about to go in the bathroom and have a but torrent.
ndn.
Post #122632

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
Anyone want to play fantasy stock market?
How does that work?
Everyone starts with $1000. You get the price that's posted when it's posted. free trades. We tabulate scores on friday afternoons.
I dunno. Is it a keeper league?
ndn.
Post #121000

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
I hope my kids do drugs.
Why?
Where else am I going to get drugs when I'm 70?
ndn. post # 115979

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
so, i check all these message boards with all these people having the same problem as me. people saying try all this bullshit. so, i think, fuck it, uninstall and reinstall.
But enough about me......
What do YOU think about me?
post #105029

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
between yahoo groups, gmail and facebook i'm down to like a half hour of work a day!!!!!!!!
down or up?
ndn
post #99187

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
Is complaining to your employer about this kind of stuff the right thing to do?
yes.
WTF? No one ever responds to me. I deserve better than this.
How does one respond to "yes"?
post #97648

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
How's the new job?
I've been in 5 pitches. We lost four and withdrew from one.
So you're 0 for 5.
I prefer 0 for 4 with a fielder's choice.
ndn.
post#93213

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
So did you get laid?
I don't kiss and tell. And no.
Head?
no. nothing. i just had a nice catholic evening.
you fucked her in the ass?
Post #85718

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
The review got me fiending for the skirt steak.
Hanger steak and skirt steak are very similar.
Chuck can suck on his panties if he doesn't like the options.
Everyone's going to be happy with whatever, dude.
Yeah, it's not like I'm going to be chewing on a mouthful of delicious Hat steak and be thinking, shit, I wish I had the Umbrella steak.
post #85293

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
You still into computers?
Actually I'm a Microsoft Certified Technology Specialist
Oh, wow, really?
Yeah, and if I pass the next one I'll be...
dorkier?
post #78894

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
I'm thinking of buying a pasta maker.
That sounds really cool.
Yeah, you can make make all kinds of....
little penis shapes?
post #78766

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
You still into computers?
Actually I'm a Microsoft Certified Technology Specialist
Oh, wow, really?
yeah, and if I pass the next one I'll be...
dorkier?
post#78894

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
End chair, middle chair, middle end chair, it doesn't matter.
What are you talking about?
Every dinner party, I'm always in the boring section.
Don't take yourself out of the boring section.
No?
Take the boring section out of yourself. Post #74679

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
last night I was at a bar and this guy beside me asks what I do for a living. I told him I was in advertising. He says, ah, marketing.
yeah?
He then goes on and on about it's who you know in > this world, and I just kinda listen, watching the braves and playing an occassional Keno card.
interesting.
He notices my braves hat and says he's a redsox fan and I say I went to highschool with Trot Nixon
So what time did leave this morning? Post #68517

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
Five.
Five.
Five
Dollar Foot Long!

 

by mancreature42
2-21-10
Hi Matt. I thought you might want to remove Peter Mayer from your references list.
He didn't bash you, but he's probably not your biggest fan either. Just thought you'd like to know.
Dear Josh, Just wanted to let you know that I won't be using you as a reference anymore, you cocksucking motherfucker. Your friend (in person), Matt
post # #56134

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
Dude, I need headlines for a fathers day gift card at Bones Steakhouse.
1. If he doesn't love you after this, he doesn't. 2. Dad hoped you'd see this ad. 3. Words can't express how much you love dad. Thank God.
I love those! Keep em coming.
4. He brought you into this world. The least you can do is take him out.
So which headline did they go with for that Father's Day thing?
Make Dad Glad. Post#12389

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
No need to be a fucking A-hole
No need to get so toughy
Is "g" really that close to "c"?
It is when your fingers are like andouille sausages.
ndn.
post #14381

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
Sex in the office should be on the bottom of the political abuse benefit poll.
I don't know, sex is pretty fun sometimes.
but Lewinsky was fat. Is fat chick sex still "fun" or a chore.
How do you not know? Your wife is fat.
(...)
Post ##14454

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
I talked to my sister up in Seattle.
Oh yeah? How's she?
She said that she and everyone on the west coast survived the tsunami warning.
Oh. it must not have been very stern.
ndn.
post ##14982

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
Who is this Hughes character, and when was he granted membership into the Underpass Gang? I don't remember being consulted.
but..
To be a member of the virtual UG, you must first be a member of the physical UG. Flesh before digital representation. That's what I say.
but...
For the absent members like Sulli, Gilbert, Herwig, DP's unborn child, Snell's bbq pit, the hulla hoop, the water bottle Rocky threw at me on Mardi Gras, Neely's old UNC hat, I speak for them.
but he's cooler than you. Post #15498

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
Poll: Who read robots last post?
Too bad whoever posted that poll cannot remember what they read.
that makes absolutely no sense.
Your poll suggests I didn't already post about what we're arguing about.
no, it suggests you talk to much and that you're an asshole.
Post #16518

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
I'll never open another tinyurl from you. That shit really will get me fired
Aren't you in I.T.?
Yeah?
Nothing should get an I.T. guy fired. It's I.T. for crying out loud.
Why do you dress up so nice just to go around and fix toilets and what not?
Post #17339

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
nice dude, nice
ndn
indian
engine
pocohantas
nice dude, nice!

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
Man, I'm just killin time.
The boss is going out of town in 2 hours.
post #19140
Then I can really kill some time.

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
love the fact that the dude goes to a new city and dines at mcdonald's.
love the fact that you poke fun at some dude who drives to Jackson to see a Saints practice and ridicule him for going to mcdonald's. he's hungry and it's cheap and convenient. you've never done it?
how do you know he was hungry? how do you know it was convenient? you don't know where the mcdonald's is in relation to his location. you don't know shit.
Post#19364

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
I like Project Runway
One can tell you have a girlfriend now.
So Christian's sister wouldn't stop talking about me, huh?
Post #32965
you're motorin'.

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
Why put "Canada" is quotes? It's one word.
...computing...
...computing....
Post #34610
B/c it's not a real country. It's like when you do the quote thing with your hands when you're talking

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
I'm nervous about meeting my new boss.
when are you grabbing a latte with that fag who wants your anus?
if I order it black, that means I'm not detailed enough but if I ask for the cream a certain way and the sugar a certain way, maybe I'm too bitchy.
i think you should order it black, and if they ask if you'd like cream, you say "no thanks, i brought my own."
ndn.
Post #34624

 

by mancreature42
2-22-10
I love it when search engines ask you if you meant "Ticker tape" instead of "Tickertape."
Then you click on their spelling and there are 0 hits. It's like they're saying "Did you mean to search for this instead? 'Cause there isn't shit there either."
Getting mocked by a search engine. Fukkers.
post #34726

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