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| Santa's sick. he asked me to deliver this letter to you in explanation | |
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| dear Ted, i've caught a rather bad case of the gout. it's a funny thing, the gout. say it out loud sometime. seriously, you owe it to yourself. the origin of the word... | |
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| so, did the letter stall him long enough? | |
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| oh yeah. stole everything in the house and put it in the pickup. it's all unloaded except for the wife and daughter. they're still on the tailgate giving the elves blowjobs | |
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