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| Thank you all for coming. I have called this press conference because our great nation is in grave danger. | |
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| From whom, Mr. President? Al-Qaida? Syria? North Korea? | |
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| No. Canada. We have evidence that Canada has Weapons Of Mass Destruction. | |
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| Yes, lots of them. All those darn hockey players with their skates and sticks...and what's with the CFL? 55 yard line? They really need to be stopped. | |
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